The Comics of Rhodey

The experiment -- done, for now

2010-02-07T10:16:00.004-05:00

Comics of Rhodey will officially be no more as of this post. I had thought I could maintain two separate blogs -- one for politics, and one for comics and entertainment -- but I just freakin' don't have the time! Thus, any future comics-related posts will be made at the place that started it all, The Colossus of Rhodey. Speaking of which, I have a couple recent comics posts up there right now!

Thanks to everyone for reading and I hope you'll continue to check us out over at Colossus.

R.I.P. George Tuska

2009-10-16T20:06:00.005-04:00

I recently saw this sad news via Bob Layton's Facebook post. Iron Man artistic legend George Tuska has passed away. To say I loved George's Iron Man would be an understatement. He was a stalwart -- his Iron Man was tough, manly and kick-ass. May you rest in peace, my friend.

Name Five Creators and a Signature Stylization

2009-08-30T16:28:00.006-04:00

I saw the topic while perusing the 'net for some artist information. Here's my five:

1. Sal Buscema -- Character mouths agape with spittle between the teeth:

2. George Tuska -- Cheesy and overly cartoonish side character faces:

3. Jack Kirby -- The "Kirby Krackle":

4. Gil Kane -- All-out punch knocking an opponent over backwards:

5. Dave Cockrum -- Buccaneer boots:

Why? I ask again, WHY??

2009-08-23T11:06:00.001-04:00

I ran across a chuckle-inducing ad at the end of She-Hulk (vol. 1) #1 the other day while perusing some new additions to my collection. The toy company Corgi once came out with a line of ... super hero cars (vehicles), and some simply defy, well, logic.

Now take a gander at the lower left-hand corner. Why would Superman need a van?? Why would Captain Marvel need a race car?? ('Tho, admittedly, it's a lot cooler than a freakin' van!) And even if Supes did need a van, why would he advertise himself on it? Isn't that like painting some "Hey Lex Luthor! Please zap me with a red sun ray right here!" graffiti? And as for that Man of Steel flying vehi-, er, contraption, Corgi actually produced that based on an appearance of it in a real comic issue!

But what's worse are the villain vehicles. I mean advertising yourself when you're a homicidal maniac isn't exactly the pinnacle of intellectualism! Here we see the Dark Knight baddies Joker and Penguin cars:

Hey Penguin: Exactly what is the purpose of that umbrella? I mean, wouldn't that kinda obstruct the view of your getaway -- not to mention cause a substantial air drag on your getaway speed?

This sort of villain ... inanity reminds me of one of the most horrible movies I ever attempted to watch: "Super Dragon's Dynamo." This wretched Taiwanese flick featured a shady organization called the "International Criminals Group" (I.C.G.). As one of my good buddies remarked while reading its VHS box, "Huh? Doesn't that name kinda give it away?"

Adiós to my favorite comics blog

2009-08-22T21:25:00.001-04:00

Mark Engblom, proprietor of Comic Coverage, is calling it quits. I'm totally bummed out by this, but I completely understand Mark's reasons.

I personally want to thank Mark for the most creative, most informative, and FUNNIEST comics site I've ever come across. Take care, mi amigo.

Comic creator aims to counter jihadist role models ...

2009-08-22T21:14:00.004-04:00

... but then again, he is a Hamas supporter and has said “There is no escaping the everyday reality of the intifada.” How nice.

They are fighting for truth, justice and the Islamic way and are heading for your living room — prepare to say salaam to the world’s first Muslim superheroes.

The 99, a Sharia-compliant version of the X-Men ... has taken the Arab world by storm and has its sights set on the West.
The franchise, which was created as a cartoon strip three years ago to counter the effects of jihadist agitprop on Muslim minds, is poised to make its debut on British television this year. An animated series is being produced by Endemol, the Dutch company that made Big Brother internationally ubiquitous. Its mission: to instill old-fashioned Islamic values in Christian, Jewish and atheist children.
The story follows a group of preternaturally gifted Muslims: The 99, each with a superpower that mirrors one of the 99 attributes of Allah.
[Creator Dr.] Naif al-Mutawa said that the idea came to him while he was riding in a black cab in London from Edgware Road to Harrods, but its seed was sown years before when he worked at the survivors of political torture unit in Bellevue Hospital, New York. Many of the young men he treated were Iraqis who had fled after being tortured under Saddam Hussein’s regime.

“It hit me that the stories I was hearing were from men who grew up believing that their leader, Saddam, was a hero, a role model — only to one day be tortured by him,” Dr al-Mutawa said. “I decided the Arab world needed better role models.”

Better role models? You mean ... like freakin' Hamas??

The book’s creator, a Hamas supporter who had sold 40,000 albums and 12 million stickers in four months, brushed off accusations that he was inciting hatred, saying: “There is no escaping the everyday reality of the intifada.”

Wonder how that support coincides with this:

Despite its Islamic basis Dr al-Mutawa said that The 99 has universal appeal. He said: “It is based on attributes such as generosity and mercy. These are not things that Islam has a monopoly over.”

That's for sure. And they're not things that groups like Hamas possess period.

Avi Green over at Four Color Media Monitor has more here and here.

1970s comics ads: The Special Investigator Kit!

2009-08-18T14:36:00.003-04:00

Via Daredevil #146 from 1977:

Now understand something: This is the ONLY COMPLETE Special Investigator Kit around. Accept no substitutes. Also:

Do not question why one of the badges has "This is a Toy" printed on it.
Don't ask who precisely the "Leading Authority" is who wrote the FREE booklet.
Don't wonder what details of the leatherette case, "authentic" ID Card, and Badge Flasher aren't in common with those "used by private & special investigators everywhere."
Don't ask "Is this really the 'Best Buy Around?'"
Don't ponder "Can this get me into the police academy?"
Don't wonder why this isn't available to residents of New York.

Dullard Wizard

2009-08-18T10:51:00.001-04:00

Wizard #215 -- Marvel's 70th Anniversary Issue -- contains its share of whoppers, and shows its continued brown-nosing of Marvel in general. Probably the biggest knee-slapper in its seventy "Marvelous Moments" is #53: "Heroes Reborn." I'm glad that at least this moment found its way pretty far down on the list, yet, honestly, let's be real -- it does deserve to be there. But check out the narrative:

"The art was, unsurprisingly, amazing"???? WTF are they smoking? Maybe Wiz's butt-kissers oughta take a gander at this post. Or, Mark Engblom's recent retrospective centering on "HR." Look, Jim Lee's art (as usual) was pretty good on Fantastic Four, and Whilce Portacio's had its moments on Iron Man, but Rob Liefeld's Cap was flat-out horrific, and Chap Yaep's in Avengers wasn't that far behind. As Engblom says about "HR," "Despite respectable sales numbers (which the hype all but guaranteed) ..." that is pretty much it in a nutshell. Hype. Exactly what Image Comics' founding was.

Next: Poor Walt Simonson. He just can't get any respect:

Yeah. Walt Simpson. Nice editing/proofreading on such a milestone issue, eh?

Regarding these next two items, see if you can ... well hell, just check 'em out:

Doesn't it just absolutely trash the very concept of key character "deaths" to laud the demise of a person like Bucky ... then at the same time to note that such a key historic moment was ignored by a current "hot" creator -- because he brought him back? And then this same "hot" creator gets similarly lauded for offing one of the companies longest-published heroes! C'mon -- "shook the comic biz to its core"? "Mainstream media as well"?? Please. Point me to ANYONE who didn't immediately know that Steve Rogers would be back as Captain America eventually. ANYONE. And it sure is easy to "shake the mainstream media" by sending out publicity blitzes to every network and newspaper extant.

Face it: character "deaths" ceased shocking people around the resurrection of Jean Grey. It's one thing to "bring back" minor characters like Wonder Man, but when you [legitimately] shock the industry by offing a popular hero and then resuscitate him/her shortly thereafter, please. I think the final straw for me was Marvel head honcho Joe Quesada's resurrection of Iron Man mentor Ho Yinsen (his brain inside Iron Man armor, at least) and original Iron Man villain Wong Chu. (Amazingly, too, Wizard ranks Quesada's ascension to Marvel editor-in-chief as #7 on their list.)

The big upside of Wiz #215 is an article on under-rated Marvel scribe Bill Mantlo. Known as "The Fill-In King," Mantlo's contribution to the Marvel mythos is by and large unknown. But for me, I know Bill as the writer of my favorite single-issue Iron Man story of all-time: "Long Time Gone." Apparently, many fans (and Marvel) think highly of this story, too, as it was reprinted in volume 3's "monster" issue, #46. If you ever have a chance to read this story, do it.

One big thing futurists got wrong!

2009-08-10T10:39:00.004-04:00

And that's the size of computers as time progressed.

Once again, I turn to Time Warp (apparently it is two words, not one like I had been writing) #5 and its story "The Vengeance of C-92." C-92 is a continent-sized computer (that's what the "C" stands for -- "continent") that runs -- you guessed it -- the whole continent.

Of course, today, we scoff at this erroneous prediction of massive computers. Just imagine what the intelligent folk at Popular Mechanics magazine feel like today based on their 1954 prediction of what a home computer would look like ... in 2004: UPDATE: This is an Internet hoax. Thanks to commenter Pat for pointing this out!

I don't know if you can read it, but the last line in the caption says "With teletype interface and the Fortran language, the computer will be easy to use." Wow.

One of the best-ever stories in early Iron Man issues is found in #5 -- "Frenzy in a Far-Flung Future." Tony Stark is whisked to the future to face judgment for his creation -- a massive computer named "Cerebrus" (see below) that has taken over the world and enslaved mankind!

In film, 1970's "Colossus: The Forbin Project" similarly believed that a powerful computer would need to be immense. Here's a shot of Colossus's "home," built inside a mountain:

This is not unlike "Krell," the planet-wide computer from "Forbidden Planet."

Colossus, and a similar Soviet supercomputer named "Guardian," joined together and took over the planet. But unlike "Skynet" in the "Terminator" films, Colossus did not desire to eliminate humanity. It actually wanted to learn from us, especially the concept of love. But don't be mistaken -- if we f***ed Colossus over and didn't do what it wished, it wouldn't hesitate to retaliate. When US military personnel attempts to replace the detonators on nuclear missiles with "dummies," Colossus explodes one of the nukes!

"Colossus" is an exceptional film despite its technology-guessing shortcomings. In fact, I use a modified version of the Colossus logo from the film at my politics-oriented blog!

Just consider how computer technology has really progressed from the earliest home computers that were available in the early 1980s. I recall an old magazine I discovered in my basement that displayed some of these models -- the "cheapest" of them cost around $5,000! Now, a laptop a fraction of the size of one of those units costs a fraction of that, and has a gazillion times the computing power. Oh, and Popular Mechanics? You don't need to know Fortran to operate it, either!

Next up? Quantum computers. Watch out!

The dirtiest line ever uttered in comics

2009-08-04T09:33:00.004-04:00

Courtesy of Timewarp #5 (1980) in the short "... Until I Find A Way In Time":

Despite this vulgarity (LOL), Sheldon Mayer's yarn may be the best I've yet read in this DC sci-fi title. It's sort of a "Timecop" tale, where an unscrupulous 25th century dude plans to make himself rich back in the 19th century. It utilizes a "closed loop" time geometry; the protagonist gets rich by betting with Martian industrial diamonds. However, these diamonds contain a strain of the "Martian Flu" which proceeds to wipe out all of humanity in a few years! Our protagonist discovers this sordid fact after he jaunts sixty years up the timestream (still in the 19th century) to take advantage of his accumulated riches. Oops. He can't even jaunt back to his home 25th century because humanity is dead -- time travel will never have been invented, so his traveling device is useless! But ... if dead humanity prevents time travel from being invented, why is our protagonist still alive?? He'd never have been born!

When lousy science meets an otherwise cool story

2009-08-03T14:06:00.001-04:00

In my recently acquired collection of late-70s/early 80s back-issues, among some of the titles was a previously unknown (to me) DC title called Timewarp. It collects short science-fiction yarns; some are really good, some not so much, and some just plain suck. Nevertheless, in issue #4, George Kashdan's story "The Uncommon Cold" contained such grievous science blunders that it totally ruined an otherwise decent story.

It begins in a future Earth where a centuries-old (human) space probe crash lands on the surface. Inside, a horrific creature emerges! The humans present wonder how an alien got onboard a human probe; but, all this pontificating is set aside as the monstrosity whips out a tendril and touches one of the humans on the arm. Within seconds, the human lets out a massive sneeze -- much to the horror of his fellows! Why horror? Because the common cold had been eradicated on Earth centuries ago! The creature is carrying "cold germs," as the panicked humans call it.

And this is where the science nonsense begins. First, how does a mere touch on the arm by someone carrying "cold germs" cause someone to sneeze virtually immediately? "Cold germs" infect a person via the nose or eyes -- hence we're always told to wash our hands frequently during the winter months, and to keep our hands away from our eyes and nose (and mouth). Even if the common cold hadn't be around for hundreds of years, it would still infect humans in the same manner. Especially so, I believe.

Soon we see some higher-ups discussing the issue before them. One scientist says, "The so-called common cold can easily develop into an epidemic or pneumonia, influenza, or other related maladies!" In response to a query as to whether there is a cure, the scientist says, "No -- when the final disease organism was wiped out hundreds of years ago, antibiotic production ceased!"

Which is fine, except ... the common cold, influenza and several types of pneumonia would not be affected by antibiotics at all!! Why? Because they're caused by viruses, not bacteria! How could an advanced future Earth not know of these fundamental science facts? And, lest you think this was just a mere oversight on author Kashdan's part, nope! He sticks withe the premise: It's discovered that the creature in the probe was actually once human, but the "cold germs" it was carrying caused her to "mutate" over the centuries into a massive walking "cold germ." (Seriously.) The higher-ups dispatch a couple agents to travel back in time to the probe's launch -- to inject the female astronaut with ... penicillin!! But penicillin is an antibiotic! The common cold, again, is caused by a virus. Pencillin would have no effect on the common cold virus!!

Yeesh. Not only did these supposedly intelligent future humans bungle this whole time-travel "rescue," the pencillin -- which miraculously cured the astronaut of the common cold VIRUS -- comes back to bite the future Earth right in the ass: The astronaut from the past planned on mutating into a massive cold-carrying entity. It was to prevent a massive "cosmic cloud" from destroying the Earth centuries in the future -- which just now happens to be enveloping the globe! (How's that for timing?) DOH! Hence, the Earth is wiped out by the organisms contained in the cloud because the "antidote" -- the common cold virus -- is no longer available thanks to our time-traveling "saviors!"

And we're back!

2009-07-20T16:49:00.003-04:00

Hey everyone! Yeah, I've been away for a while; my family and I went down to Costa Rica for almost three weeks. My wife is from there, and we celebrated our daughter's 15th birthday there -- she was a "quinceañera" in Latino culture.

At any rate, yesterday was sort of a banner day for me in terms of comics. A buddy of mine's folks were moving out of their home of 40 years, and this buddy had six boxes of comics to get rid of! "Don't you dare trash them!" I said. "Don't you dare give them to a library or something!" I pleaded. So, much to my wife's chagrin, I journeyed an hour and a half to the house in question, picked up the six boxes, and journeyed back another hour and a half. Needless to say, I am set up for some PRIME reading material for quite some time! I'm sure I'll find some terrific nuggets to post about within the many pages that await my perusual.

Oh brother. Ultimate "Armor Wars!"

2009-06-23T20:17:00.010-04:00

Snell over at Slay, Monstrobot of the Deep tips us off to another modern Marvel head-shaker: Ultimate Armor Wars.

Say WHAAAAT??

Snell nails the whole hassle with the "Ultimate" universe (my emphasis):

One of my big objections to what (admittedly little) I've seen of the Ultimate Universe is the completely wasted opportunity.

Created to be an entry point for new readers, to negate the need for knowledge of 40 years of continuity, the Ultimate books were in a perfect position to tell brand new stories, create brand new characters, and go where no Marvel has gone before.

Instead, all too often, the books seemed to be a race to introduce as many "Ultimate" versions of Earth-616 characters as possible. Damn the original story ideas, here's Ultimate Cable and Ultimate Stryfe and Ultimate Scorpion and the Ultimate Galactus trilogy and Ultimate this and Ultimate that. Rather than an entry point for new readers, they were marketed to attract old readers: "Come see our new version of X and Y!!"
Sigh. Stay tuned for Ultimate Kree-Skrull War, Ultimate Contest of Champions, Ultimate Infinity Gauntlet, Ultimate Celestial Madonna Saga, Ultimate Demon in a Bottle, Ultimate...

"Sigh" is right. Besides the ridiculously overt [left-wing] politicking that has overcome Marvel in the last few years (which is documented so aptly over at Avi Green's Four Color Media Monitor; in addition, Warren Ellis is scripting "Ultimate Armor Wars" which, if his volume four Iron Man arc is any indication, get ready for some far-left preaching), the stories just really started to suck. I was a fan of the first volume of The Ultimates, but then things began to spiral downhill, as Snell so eloquently noted above.

I wonder what David Michelinie, author of the original "Armor Wars," thinks of this. (The first issue, Iron Man #225, is at top left.) I'll have to drop him an e-mail ...

They're FORCE beams! Or, how to screw up Cyclops

2009-06-23T09:33:00.006-04:00

I've been cruising my way through Essential Captain America volume 4 and I finally reached the climax of the "Secret Empire" storyline. But boy -- did Cap #173 ever screw up! First, check out the cover:

Look at Cyclops there over on the left. First, why is he seemingly lifting his visor up to fire his optic beams? Second, why is his beam melting that SHIELD agent's gun? Gil Kane -- I'm calling you OUT!! ;-)

But that's not the end of it. Inside the issue, we see Cyke do this:

Starting a forest fire -- by shooting his eye beams!! COME ON!! Looks like a few folks (um, Steve Englehart and Sal Buscema) forgot this little nugget from X-Men #43, a small special segment dealing with the X-Men's powers and origins:

This issue was from 1968, so there's no excuse for the creators of Cap #173, which was published in 1974, not to know this important info about the X-Men's field leader!

Status of the Squadron Supreme?

2009-06-21T19:21:00.000-04:00

As I noted towards the end of this post, the Squadron Supreme (that's the original Squadron Supreme, the one from Earth-712 or Earth-S), apparently have seen their own earth suffer major damage yet again thanks to shenanigans on the part of the "Ultimate" universe. This occurred in the "Ultimate Power" limited series.

My question is: What precisely is the status of Earth-S now -- if it's known?

Please fill me in!

Avengers featured in a MAS*H faux pas

2009-06-19T18:35:00.005-04:00

I've noticed a gaffe in my favorite TV show of all-time for many years now -- something only a true Marvelite could catch. Check out these two images of "Radar" O'Reilly asleep in his cot:

See what that red arrow is pointing at? Look closely. Yep, that's an issue of Avengers #60 from 1969. Check it:

So tell me: How can Radar be reading a comic from at least sixteen years in the future?? (The Korean War lasted from 1950-1953.)

Talk about a rough time!

2009-06-19T14:49:00.002-04:00

I've been a fan of the Squadron Supreme since my grade school days. How come? 'Cuz that's when those fantastic issues of The Avengers came out -- y'know, the first George Pérez Marvel issues, #s 141-150 ('cepting #s 145-146) -- where Earth's Mightiest took on the SS in an all-out donneybrook that took several issues. (If you're a Vision fan like me, Avengers #147 is pure android action GOLD!) I even had one of those Marvel notebook binders with the classic cover of Avengers #141 on it (check out the lower left of the pic). But it wasn't until years later that I realized that the SS's first appearance took place in the pages of The Avengers way before -- specifically issue #85.

No, no, NO! Not issue #70, as you may be thinking! Cripes, even Marvel's own writers could not keep the Squadron Supreme distinct from the Squadron Sinister. Look at the cover to Avengers #85 -- it says "Featuring the sensational return of the Squadron Sinister!" NO! The Squadron Sinister, whose first appearance was, again, in issue #70, was a creation of the cosmic gamester the Grandmaster -- to use against the Avengers who were fighting for Kang the Conqueror. The Squadron Supreme are earth's mightiest heroes of an alternate dimension. Marvel made this boner again with the classic #141 cover, and of all people Steve Englehart didn't know the difference as evidenced by Iron Man's battle with Dr. Spectrum in #148: as Shellhead zaps Spectrum with his ultraviolet beam, he says "I'm sure you remember it!" But how could he? Iron Man had only fought the Squadron Sinister's Doc Spectrum previously (in Avengers #70 and in Iron Man #63-65)! The ironic thing is, back in #141, Englehart has Hyperion telling the Avengers that "That's Supreme, not Sinister, Avengers. Just so you'll know who creamed you!" Sheesh!

Now that that's straight(!), back to the topic of this post. The Squadron Supreme's earth has had one rough time of it over its sporadic history at Marvel. Not so subtlely a copy of DC's Justice League, the SS's first planet-threatening hassle came in the aforementioned Avengers #85. A mutant child named (aptly enough) Brain Child (at left) had grown fed up with the taunts and ridicule of humanity, and planned to launch a rocket into the sun -- causing it to go nova and destroying all life on Earth. The Squadron Supreme thought they were merely assisting with the launch of a solar exploration vehicle; however, thankfully, a quartet of Avengers (who were dimension-traveling back from Arkon's dimension) got sidetracked to the SS's earth -- but a couple days after Brain Child's rocket had done its job! After witnessing the extreme destruction and before they completely materialize, the Scarlet Witch throws a hex in the proverbial nick, and the quartet is whisked back to a day before the missile's firing.

After the usual "let's fight because we don't believe each other" scrap, the four misplaced Avengers manage to convince the SS's Nighthawk of their pending predicament. Of course, to get even more action into the mag, the three members of the SS overseeing the rocket launch -- Hyperion, Dr. Spectrum and the Whizzer -- don't believe the Avengers, nor their own team member. Eventually, though, the Avengers manage to halt the rocket launch, and then the teams join forces against Brain Child. (The WTF moment at the end is when Dr. Spectrum uses his power prism to turn BC back into a normal kid; like, why couldn't he have done that previously? Like, y'know, give him the appearance of a normal kid, yet allow him to retain his enormous intellect? Sheesh ...).

We next see the Squadron in the aforementioned Avengers #141. This time, the United States of the Squadron's world had been overcome by the influence of the Serpent Crown, essentially turning it into a fascist state. (The Whizzer tells Captain America in #147 that their United States is "more advanced, socially," which I take to mean a form of socialism.) The Crown's representative on our earth, Hugh Jones, had summoned the Squadron to help dispatch of the Avengers on our world; however, when they became too big a threat, Jones shunted both teams to the Squadron's dimension (Avengers #144). Remarkably, it merely took the Beast, disguised as the Squadron world's US president (Nelson Rockefeller, of all people), to illuminate the Squadron as to just what had happened to their own country! In the waning panels of Avengers #148, we see various Squadroners pondering all they "to worry about right here."

Things get a lot worse by the Squadron's next Marvel appearance. The ultra-powerful Overmind has discovered the Squadron earth (henceforth "Earth-S") and has taken over the mind of the new US president, Kyle Richmond, who was the Squadron's Nighthawk (see Defenders #112-115). As Richmond summons the Squadron, the Overmind attacks -- and quickly take control of the team, save the mighty Hyperion. Hyperion flees and manages to enlist the aid of our earth's Defenders. Eventually, the Defenders manage to defeat the evil mentalist as well as Null, the Living Darkness, which had occupied Overmind. But this victory shows just how insidious the Overmind's influence was: the planet is now is total chaos as the United States had attacked and plundered the rest of the globe while it was under the control of the villain. Without this control, anarchy ensues.

The acclaimed Squadron Supreme Limited Series by Mark Gruenwald picks up almost right after the Squadron's victory over the Overmind/Null. The team is distraught over the world situation due to their brainwashing, and they're determined to do something about it. They ultimately decide to institute a "Utopia Program" whereby they promise to eliminate crime, disease and even death! However, several team members, notably Nighthawk (the recently resigned President Richmond), are horrified by the program saying it will be a dictatorship led by the Squadron. Since he's outvoted, Nighthawk decides to quit the team rather than be part of another authoritarian government, however beneficient. Eventually, Nighthawk recruits allies to his cause, especially after witnessing the Squadron's "behavior modification" of criminals -- a procedure which literally brainwashes people and removes whatever degree of free will the programmer wants.

Richmond and his "Redeemers" ultimately face off against the Squadron, resulting in several deaths -- including that of Nighthawk himself! Hyperion and the surviving Squadders decide to abandon the Utopia Program, albeit incrementally so as not to lead to anymore chaos.

Such was not to be. Shortly after the Squadron renounces their program, a cosmic threat appears! A massive "hand" has appeared near the sun and will extinguish it in a matter of hours! As detailed in the "Death of Universe" graphic novel, the team has to join forces with their arch-enemy, Master Menace (Emil Burbank) in order to defeat the cosmic entity! The entity turns out to be the Nth Man, who was shunted from our own dimension. He's already consumed numerous whole universes, and the Squadron's is next on his list. The Squadron's Arcanna ends up sacrificing her youngest child, with whom the Nth Man trades places, to save her universe!

But before the surviving team members can return to [their] Earth, the dastardly Master Menace (who fled the Nth Man by shunting himself to another dimension) quickly forgets their recent teamwork and shunts the SS to another universe -- our own! (This act was revealed in the Squadron Supreme: New World Order graphic novel.) The Squadron hooks up with the hero Quasar, and ends up shacking up at Project: Pegasus (see Quasar #13-17). The head of Pegasus turns out to be the mind-controlling villain Corruptor, and so for a third time the Squadron falls prey to mental manipulation! The Corruptor, who's working for old Avengers baddie Imus Champion, uses the Squadron to tarnish the reputation of the newly-back-in-action Avengers (having just returned from the "Heroes Reborn" pocket universe; see Avengers volume 3, #5-6). The Avengers eventually thwart the Corruptor's machinations, but Champion isn't through yet. He manages to get both teams to meet him on his own terms (Avengers/Squadron Supreme Annual 1998) with the threat that if they do not defeat him, millions across the globe will die. Thankfully, Firestar yuks it up with some ants -- which quickly inform Hank Pym, aka Giant Man, and he shuts down Champion's various death devices.

Iron Man discovers an "Nth Projector" among Imus Champion's acquired artifacts, and soon programs it to send the Squadron back to their own dimension. But upon arrival (as chronicled in "New World Order"), laser satellites blast the team's craft out of the sky! Huh?? Dr. Spectrum hauls Squadders the Shape and Skylark to a hospital for help, only to discover that the government is a fascist dictatorship! Hyperion discovers that a "Global Directorate" was elected -- yes, elected -- to power after the Squadron failed to come back to Earth and continue to dismantle their Utopia Program (because, as noted above, Master Menace had shunted them away to our universe). The people of the world "chose order over chaos," a member of the GD informs Hyperion. In addition, the GD had captured Menace upon his return to Earth, used an old Squadron "behavior modification" device on him, and forced him to invent technological wonders for them. The Nth Man, now in the form of an entity dubbed Mysterium, informs the Squadron that they need to get the original members of the team back together in order to defeat the Global Directorate. Indeed, Hyperion, Dr. Spectrum, Power Princess and the Whizzer seek out the disillusioned Amphibian (who, like Nighthawk, had quit the team over the Utopia Program) and the meek Skymax the Skrullrian Skymaster, and implore Nighthawk's son, who's taken up his father's mantle, to join them.

In The Exiles (#77-78), we learn that the Squadron had defeated the Global Directorate and a new democratic government had been elected. However, the Exiles inform the Squadron that the new government had engaged in massive, worldwide vote fraud. The two teams then oust this new government and the Squadron reasserts their role as the world's leading super-team, continuing to assist with the reconstruction of society.

The latest appearance of the Squadron Supreme was in the pages of the "Ultimate Power" series. The story intersected the "Ultimate" universe and the "Supreme Power" univese (or "Supremeverse"), the latter being a reimagining of the Squadron Supreme. However, the original Squadron -- from Earth-S -- also make an appearance, declaring that one of Ultimate Reed Richards' interdimensional probes has laid waste to their planet, just like one did to their reimagined dopplegangers!

Whew! So folks -- you think the "standard" Marvel Universe (our own) has it bad with threats from Doc Doom, Galactus, and the Skrulls? Just thank the Maker you're not in Universe 712, home of Earth-S. To recap, there, a small hyperintelligent child almost fried the planet, an alien crown clandestinely subdued the United States, an alien super-telepath took over the world and caused mass anarchy, a cosmic entity threatened the entire universe, a fascist cadre of corporate heads took over shortly thereafter, the subsequent government came to power through massive fraud, and then an interdimensional probe wiped out your planet.

Ouch.

What's your favorite Marvel Alternate Reality?

2009-06-18T17:32:00.005-04:00

I've included some "biggies" in the poll below; however, feel free to vote for your own in the comments.

Earth designations are taken from here, by the way. And, for what it's worth, my fave is the Squadron Supreme Earth.

Possibly the LAMEST origin ever!

2009-06-18T12:30:00.000-04:00

Don't get me wrong -- I love me some Steve Englehart. The guy is one of the greatest writers in the history of the biz, no doubt. But he also came up with one of the LAMEST super-villain origins of all-time. Journey with me back in time to 1973 and Captain America #160. The newly super-strong Cap (thanks to a chemical reaction to villain Viper's anti-venom a few issues prior) battles a sun-powered dude name Solarr! How did he get his powers? Check it (I hadda skip a few panels due to the smearing from scanning an Essential volume, natch):

That's it! There you have it! Just get lost in the desert, manage to survive the heat and thirst, and violá! INSTANT SUPER-VILLAIN!!

A newly discovered Fantastic Four issue!

2009-06-16T19:39:00.005-04:00

Check it out -- a variant cover of Fantastic Four #21 in glorious black & white discovered in a dusty long box! (Click on image for larger version.)

Just a "What If?" if these moonbats were around in Stan and Jack's era.

Why Earth should rival the Kree and the Skrulls

2009-06-16T12:45:00.002-04:00

The short two word answer: Reed Richards.

There are other myriad examples, sure, but perhaps Fantastic Four #37 offers up the best of 'em. Upset by the death of her father by the Skrulls (FF #32), Sue Storm convinces Reed to do up an interstellar journey of VENGEANCE! Of course, there's the problem of how a lowly Earth vessel can traverse some two million light-years to the Andromeda Galaxy! Wait, did I say "problem?" Heh. Reed Richards knows not the meaning of the term! To get to the Skrull Throneworld, Reed merely outfits a Saturn V rocket with a new "thrust-drive mechanism" based on his new "power ray device" -- a device which "draws energy from an unknown source from somewhere beyond the confines of our solar system and converts it into raw, usable power!"

Oh, is that all?

Richards remarks that NASA, the American space agency, was "anxious to test" Reed's thrust-drive. So, given that it was a total success, why didn't the agency make use of it? Why wasn't a feet of Earth vessels constructed and outfitted with Richards' drive not only to challenge the Skrull and Kree empires' encroachments into our solar system, but for basic -- interstellar -- exploration?

The obvious answer is that comics' "suspension of reality" can only go so far. What makes (made, actually) Marvel Comics so great is that the incredible operate within the credible. Making Earth an interstellar empire to rival the Kree and Skrulls makes for a cool "What If?" yarn (like in What If? volume 2 #19), but not for an ongoing comics universe. The next answer is that Richards might have been invoking a sort of "Prime Directive" -- that the fruits of his vastly superior intellect not interfere with the natural course of human development. Unlike the Kree and Skrulls, Earth doesn't even have a world government. How a "united Earth" space fleet would operate is problematic at best. Reed certainly wouldn't want a situation like that pondered by Starhawk in an early Guardians of the Galaxy tale (Marvel Presents #3) where he says "The humans have beaten the Badoon. It remains to be seen whether they will triumph over their basest emotions." In other words, humanity isn't ready to journey the stars just yet.

(Of course, this doesn't address the fact that the Kree weren't ready to journey the stars either when they acquired advanced technology -- acquired from the Skrulls, as a matter of fact. See Avengers #133, panel at above left. Modern humanity is considerably more advanced than the Kree were when they overcame their Skrull masters millenia ago.)

The third -- and probably best explanation for comics' sake -- is that Richards and the US (and others') government(s) had (have) his advanced inventions in reserve -- in secret -- for whenever needed for the planet's defense. (And all the while using them behind the scenes to advance humanity as quickly as feasible.)

Just some friendly ponderings ... !

YAAAAWWWN. Steve Rogers is coming back

2009-06-15T17:45:00.003-04:00

Did anyone really think this wasn't going to happen? Seriously? Cheeyeah, right.

Rising from the dead after being killed off over two years ago, Captain America is being resurrected by Marvel Comics.

Though the circumstances of his return are being closely shielded, the star-spangled superhero returns July 1 in a five-comic-book series, "Captain America Reborn."

A big-budget movie in development by Marvel is also expected in 2011. (Source.)

Wow. Color me surprised. Not. Anyone who falls for these gimmicks anymore deserves to join a new superhero group straight out of Not Brand Echh: The Naive Nitwits.

1970s comics ads: Gritboy!

2009-05-31T16:21:00.000-04:00

Here we have "The Adventures of Gritboy" from Defenders #63 from 1978! Grit was a newspaper that kids could sell to earn some extra cash:

Yep, he sure did have a problem! And you know what it really was? He (and his buddies) wore the exact same clothes every day!

The actual final panel ought to go like this:

Who'da thunk it?

2009-05-31T15:58:00.001-04:00

(I'm continuing some "reprints" of past comics-related posts from my politics blog as I plan on eventually deleting that category from the site ...)

Who would have thought this, huh? Check out this advertisement from Avengers #165 from 1977:

Yep, that's an ad for the "All-New" X-Men. "All-new" because in order to boost sales (yes, you read that right) in the mid-70s, writer Len Wein and artist Dave Cockrum revised the original line-up of Stan Lee and Jack Kirby's merry mutants that launched in 1963. Included in that line-up was a dude named ... Wolverine. Heard of him? ;-)

But that's only part of the story. Check out what is circled in red from above:

Indeed -- X-Men magazine used to come out once every two months!! Looking back from today this is an astonishing bit of trivia. X-Men was actually almost canceled completely because of poor sales in the early 70s. The book was only comprised of reprints of earlier issues for most of that time period. Then, in 1975, Wein and Cockrum came out with Giant-Size X-Men #1 ...

... and about 20 years later the mutant characters were by far Marvel Comics' greatest creative asset. They pretty much remain so today, too. Wolverine may even be more popular than Marvel's "flagship" character of Spider-Man. There have been three "X-Men" movies, and the "Wolverine" flick.

By the way, if you're looking for a nice copy of Giant-Size X-Men #1, good luck. That, and make sure your bank account is well padded.

1970s comics ads: The anti-gravity device!

2009-05-31T14:14:00.000-04:00

Hey everyone! Can you believe we've all been sitting on our asses while the greatest invention of the last 500 years was discovered over forty years ago?? That's right -- I just found this ad in yet another early 1970s Iron Man issue (#49 from 1972, specifically):

Can you imagine that? For a crummy quarter and a dime, an ANTI-GRAVITY DEVICE can be yours!!

What's not generally known is that Tony Stark (Iron Man's alter-ego) created the thing! That's right -- and then he proved what a lousy capitalist he is by offering it to the public at large ... for a crummy 35 cents!

Sheesh.

Tales of the DISPROPORTIONATE HEROES!

2009-05-31T10:23:00.004-04:00

The (awesome) Iron Man cartoon opening from 1996:

Notice at the very end when IM punches the steel wall? He swings with his right arm, but the impression on the wall ... is of his left fist! DOH!

1970s comics ads: G.I. Joe and Bulletman

2009-05-31T10:01:00.003-04:00

(I'm continuing some "reprints" of past comics-related posts from my politics blog as I plan on eventually deleting that category from the site ...)

Of course, one of the more facetious aspects about collecting comics back in the day was the cheesy ads found at the very back of the books. In the mid-70s, many of these featured GI Joe and the various incarnations thereof. By "various incarnations" I mean the attempt by Hasbro to make Joe characters more "superhero-like." Take this ad, for instance (click on image for a larger version):

In the first panel, we see Mike Power, Atomic Man lugging around Eagle-Eye GI Joe. Notice it says that they're "on patrol." On patrol?? 'Ya think they could get Eagle-Eye Joe some sort of gandola or something to sit in, don'tcha? I mean, he's gotta just hang on to Mike Power's leg the whole time?? (Better view on the second panel below.) Face it -- after about ten minutes of grabbing a mere leg, Eagle-Eye would be bitching to his superiors "Hey guys, let's get real here. Gimme a friggin' seat or somethin', huh? I'm not super-strong, after all! All I got are sharp eyes!!"

But this ad actually introduces another GI Joe "superhero" into the mix: Bulletman, the Human Bullet. Not only does he have a costume that'd make the guys on "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" wince, but he's quick with the witty quip, too!

In addition, it is a bit perplexing how Bulletman just ups and joins the GI Joe Crew with no hesitation whatsoever:

How d'ya like that? Bulletman, the Human Bullet and World's Thickest Superhero. I mean, there could be no chance that Mike Power and Eagle Eye could be ... Soviet Agents, right? (Remember -- this is the mid-70s!) "Hey Bulletman, come on back with us to our HQ so we can get you squared away with joining our little coffee clatch ... !" **WHAM!!** Instant prisoner. Now here comes the KGB to claim their prize!

Mark, over at the awesome Comic Coverage, has the scoop on a different Bulletman.

1970s comics ads: The Six Million Dollar Man

2009-05-29T15:33:00.000-04:00

One of the few sci-fi staples of the 1970s was the TV show "Six Million Dollar Man." Lee Majors (married at the time to goddess Farrah Fawcett) played Colonel Steve Austin, an astronaut who is severely injured in a flight accident, and is subsequently "rebuilt" with bionic implants which essentially make him a super-human. The show was a smash hit, and of course, numerous Six Million Dollar Man products hit the kiddie shelves as well as comicbook advertising pages (click image for larger view):

Sure, by today's standards the ad is beyond cheesy, but what makes this cheese especially high in dairy fat is Steve Austin's "Special Mission Outfit":

Denim leisure suit?? For "special" missions? Like, where -- rooting out the Communist influence from ... Studio 54?

Rob Liefeld's hackery continued: Agent America

2009-05-29T14:53:00.002-04:00

Here's a reprint of a segment of an Advanced Iron article I wrote back in late 2004:

In what I could dub “It Came From the Rip-Off Bin,” I actually got for free what is essentially an advertisement for totally lame comic “creator” Rob Liefeld’s AGENT: AMERICA (see below).

Cripes, the utter gall it took to “create” such a rip-off of CAPTAIN AMERICA must’ve known no bounds. After Liefeld was axed by Marvel for his pathetic job on volume 2 CAPT. AMERICA, he founded a co. called “Awesome Entertainment.” There, he acquired the rights to a Jack Kirby character called “Fighting American” who Jack created with Joe Simon in the 50s as an American “Cold Warrior.” Liefeld used his never-realized “ideas” from vol. 2 CAP in AGENT: AMERICA … wait, check that – he ultimately decided to use the old Kirby moniker of FIGHTING AMERICAN. Because …

… considering how pathetically close an imitation AGENT: AMERICA was to CAPTAIN AMERICA, Marvel sued Liefeld. The court’s decision was that Liefeld and Awesome Entertainment could keep FIGHTING AMERICAN (seen at left) but not AGENT, and he could never be seen throwing his shield. In addition, Rob had to alter FA’s costume to make it less “Cap-like.”

Yeesh. Doing online research about this story got me pretty confused. I think the above nails down pretty well what transpired. However, I did discover that DC had once revived FIGHTING AMERICAN in 1994 as a pretty straightforward revamp of Kirby and Simon’s character. Thanks to the UK International Hero website and Christopher Vanette for their valuable insight.

***************

Again, if you haven't yet checked out this site dedicated to Liefeld's lameness, be sure to stop by.

(A slightly modified post of this was published at The Colossus of Rhodey a year ago.)

The definition of coolness

2009-05-29T14:47:00.000-04:00

OK, if 'ya don't know by now, 'ol Hube is one big Iron Man fan. He has been since his youngest days as a lad. In the 1990s, I made use of my immense Iron Man knowledge by contributing to Advanced Iron, the Iron Man fan magazine or "fanzine" as they're known. When volume 3 Iron Man began (1998, known as "Heroes Return"), I and other fanzine contributors got to know many of the title's creators pretty well. The inaugural artist of volume 3 IM was one Sean Chen. Sean was just then making his big foray into big-time comics, and was quite thankful for the exposure and encouragement our fanzine gave him.

In December of 2001 when my family and another were vacationing in New York City, Sean was gracious enough to invite me to his Manhattan apartment/studio for a visit. Wow -- what a life! And I mean that most enviously. Sean had a terrific view of the Empire State Building, and his domicile was also his studio where he churned out all his work. He is one awesome guy.

And unbeknownst to me when I first bought Iron Man volume 3 #17, Sean included a tiny "hat-tip" to yours truly:

Yep, that's the name "Hube" on top of that taxi! The [main] panel is 'ol Tony Stark introducing one his many squeezes to secretary Virginia "Pepper" Potts (who was played by Gwyneth Paltrow in the movie). I said "unbeknownst to me" because I never noticed it when I first read the issue. It wasn't until I received an e-mail from Sean asking me "what I thought of that taxi" that I realized what Chen had did!

In a word or two, how cool is that?

(A slightly modified version of this post appeared at The Colossus of Rhodey about a year ago.)

Tales of the DISPROPORTIONATE HEROES!

2009-05-20T15:44:00.003-04:00

Yep, comics artists are people too, so yep -- they make mistakes like anyone else. Stan Lee, when he began the "No-Prize" decades ago, pretty much enabled fans to go looking for any sort of blunder they could find in Marvel's pages.

Today we have the cover to Uncanny X-Men #173. Paul Smith had just recently assumed art chores from stalwart X-artist Dave Cockrum, and this Wolverine-dominated cover is pretty darn cool ... except that new X-Man Rogue must have some fairly ... unique anatomy:

Where, precisely, is her right leg bending? At that angle, it'd have to going through her left leg -- at least partially. The way she's depicted, there's just no way for that right leg to be anywhere else! And if it's somehow neatly "wrapped" around her left leg, then Smith's [non-existent] next panel would have to be of Rogue falling smack on her face.

Cap no longer has to "cover up"

2009-05-09T17:56:00.003-04:00

The world we live in:

Courtesy Bizarro.

Dullard Wizard

2009-05-09T11:27:00.002-04:00

Look, when I buy a comics info mag, why the hell would I want to constantly see highlighted the guy I didn't vote for for president? Comics are supposed to be about a reality break. Wizard #211 and #212 both feature the CiC on their covers -- #211 a pic of Barack and Michelle Obama (from a comic, I assume) doing their "fist bump" and mentioning how the couple "rule" comics, toys and more. Uh-huh. Right. #212 highlights the FREE! Obama Topps [trading] card that's inside the issue. I'm sure kids are going wild trading the things that in a few months will be absolutely worthless. Much like the over-hyped comics editions that featured the prez.

#211 features a two-page spread on all the Obama "collectibles" available. Call me cynical, but isn't that John K. Limited Edition 9" Barack Obama on page 17 (see below) just a little ... offensive?

And wow -- look at all those comics Barack has been featured in! #212, on page 78, has two of these issues as their "Top 5 Premiums" -- the "hottest exclusives and variants." They write:

In this month's top five, the quickest way to make the moolah should be
pretty obvious -- slap a president with a 63 percent approval rating in the
book.

Is that right? George W. Bush actually had a higher rating than that after his first 100 days in office; where were all the guest appearances by him in comics in early 2001? Cheeyeah, right. A conservative Republican endorsed by modern comics writers? HA! And c'mon -- $200 freakin' dollars for Savage Dragon #137 -- just 'cuz Obama's on the cover? Outrageous. What makes that so laughable is that nobody even freakin' reads Savage Dragon.

#212 also has an entire page devoted to those Topps trading cards. Aww ... isn't this one sweet?

Then there's the advertisement for the President Obama issue of ToyFare (#143):

Dude, fix that friggin' collar, will'ya?

#211 has the "25 Reasons J.J. Abrams' New 'Star Trek' Film Will Live Long and Prosper." Now, the one thing that gets me about Wizard, perhaps above all else, is that its writers come off as omniscient "experts" on not just comics, but popular culture in general. And there's nothing more annoying about supposed experts just outright blowing simple facts. They did this in #209 when "informing" us about Iron Man; they do it again here with "Trek." With #8 on their list they get right an obscure fact -- that supposed Enterprise captain Robert April is "non-canonical" (Trek author Michael Okuda patterned April after "Trek" founder Gene Roddenberry) -- but in #15 they write the following:

Despite being the birthplace of arguably the series' most beloved character,
we've spent little actual time on Spock's homeworld, Vulcan (aside from the
"Amok Time" OS episode and a few scenes in "The Voyage Home").

But that's far from accurate. The prequel series "Enterprise" featured several episodes that highlighted Vulcan, including a two-parter that was almost entirely on the planet. What -- is "Enterprise" not treated as canon, too?

In addition, #23 states (regarding Starfleet Academy) "The breeding ground of Starfleet's elite has often been alluded to, but we've never really been allowed into the much-vaunted halls of Starfleet Academy." Really? Tell that to "Next Generation's" "The First Duty" which took place almost entirely on the Academy's campus! (This was the episode where Wesley Crusher, while at the Academy, got into some hot water hotdogging it up with some pals in their fighter craft, and it led to a fellow recruit's death.)

Hube's "AW C'MON!" post of the week

2009-05-08T17:03:00.001-04:00

Right to the point: After watching "X-Men Origins: Wolverine" with me, my buddy Brent told me I just had to check out this issue of Wolverine that he had. "You won't believe it," it said.

Indeed I didn't.

Wolverine #48 by writer Marc Guggenheim only served to make me guffaw a [very] loud "AW C'MON!!" #48 continues the story from #43, where villain Nitro blows himself up and atomizes not only Wolverine but the rest of a strike team assigned to take him out for his actions at the beginning of the epic "Civil War" saga.

Notice I said "atomizes." (See at left.) Of course, Wolverine's adamantium skeleton prevents him from being completely disintegrated. That's because the adamantium is not a natural part of his body -- it is an artificial man-made metal infused into him some 30+ years ago. But all of Wolverine's natural body was zapped. Completely.

This doesn't stop Guggenheim from concocting one of the most laughable moments I've read in a Marvel comic. He makes Wolverine immortal. Even though only his adamantium remains ... and the rest of him was totally destroyed ... Wolverine's body regenerates. Completely.

AW, C'MON!!

Sorry, but [much] better creators like Chris Claremont and John Byrne knew that Wolverine isn't totally invulnerable. Just look at the classic "Days of Future Past" two-parter. In the second issue (Uncanny X-Men #142), an aged Colossus "fastball specials" Wolverine toward a supposedly unsuspecting Sentinel. But the giant robot turns quickly, and flash fries Wolverine -- leaving only his skeleton remaining. His fellow surviving X-Men all are horrified by the fact that he "was gone."

Wolverine #48: Yet another reason I don't buy modern comics anymore.

1970s and 80s comics ads: The severed finger (and more)

2009-05-04T19:43:00.007-04:00

I'll never forget when I bought Iron Man #100. It was our local 7-11; I had ridden my Schwinn 10-speed up there with a couple quarters in hand, and upon exiting with this prized issue, I ran into a couple acquaintances of a good buddy of mine. I knew these guys were funny dudes, but I didn't realize how funny until they asked to see my comic ... and totally ripped on the ad on the back cover: The classic Spalding "Street Ball" featuring Rick Barry and Dr. J!! The funniest part was this panel:

How is that a 30-footer?? Look where he's jumping from! He's almost right next to the key, for cripe's sake!! A 30-footer is almost a half-court shot straight away from the basket! Check out professional court dimensions here. But hey, given the previous panel where 'ol Doc slams the balls home, they hadda make poor Rick look good somehow! (Full disclosure: I live near Philly and am a lifelong Dr. J. fan. Met him and got his autograph back in 1980.)

Then I noticed this ad after pulling that pic of Count Nefaria (from Avengers #165) for my Adamantium post:

OK, why would someone want a gag severed finger ... as a keychain?? And what "quality parts" does this "Finger Factory" use in their ... ingredients?? And last but not least, who would even fall for this??

Lastly, while combing through Deadman #1 (1985) there was this (very tiny) ad:

Twenty-four years ago and a tiny, barely noticeable ad wants $5.00 for ... magic spells. Call me crazy but it's this sort of ad that kinda makes wonder if $5.00 might actually be worth it ... !!

(Fairly brief) "Wolverine" review (spoilers!)

2009-05-02T08:37:00.000-04:00

Just got back a little while ago (yesterday now, by the time I'm getting this post up) from seeing "Wolverine" (hope you don't me not using the unnecessarily long "X-Men Origins: Wolverine") and without going into an in-depth review, I'd like to add a few thoughts for your more in-the-know [Marvel] comics fan.

First, I'd give the movie a "B-," meaning it was simply good. The action is great as are the F/X, but the backstory is skimpy enough and has enough "WTFs" in it that it prevents anything more. The beginning is well done in that it, a la "Watchmen," shows in flashbacks Wolverine ("James" or "Jimmy," as brother Sabretooth calls him, as in James Howlett from "Origin") and Sabretooth from their beginnings as young boys (in the mid-1800s!!) through the 1970s. Wolvie and 'Tooth take part in every major conflict from the American Civil War through Vietnam. During 'Nam, William Stryker (from "X-Men 2" infamy) pops up to recruit the mutant brothers to his special task force. Wolvie doesn't much like the killing that goes on, so he ups and leaves after a few missions.

Ha.

Stryker and the force keep tabs on him during Wolvie's "normal" life as a lumberjack(!), eventually "inducing" him to come back through deception.

Here are some of the more notable "WTF" moments, big and small. Or, as my teaching colleague, good friend and comics aficionado Brent would say, "COME ON!! moments":

Stryker and the doctors of the Weapon X program went to great pains to make sure Wolverine knew he'd be in utter agony during the Adamantium bonding process. Yet, the procedure didn't convey that agony to the degree you'd expect. I was expecting Jackman to be thrashing about uncontrollably and look like a guy on the verge of madness. Nothing even close to that was shown. COME ON!!
My pal Brent caught this one: As Agent Zero and other Stryker hitmen are attempting to off Wolverine, Logan is finally victorious after smashing the helicopter they're all on. He crashes with the copter, and rolls several hundred feet along a gravel road. (Obviously, his new Adamantium bones and healing factor save him.) But -- his new leather coat appears brand-spankin' new in the very next scene ... after it should'a been torn to shreds from the recent battle!! COME ON!!
How'd Wolverine lose his memory of all this? The movie "covers" this angle -- by having Stryker shoot two Adamantium bullets into Logan's skull! (A doctor informs Stryker that "his brain will heal," but Stryker then says "his memories won't.") OK, I'll buy that ... but Logan's healing powers won't close up two holes in his Adamantium skull!! He'd be walking around forever with these two bullet holes! Why didn't Jean Grey detect these in "X-Men" when she was checking Logan out in the medical lab? COME ON!!
Stryker's lab was located at ... Three Mile Island? (Gambit implies to Logan that "that'd be the last place you'd expect to find such a facility" -- Stryker's -- so ...) But Gambit and Logan fly right over the place in a Cesna! Like, it's a nuclear power plant!! Even back in the 1970s (where the bulk of the movie occurs) there were regulations (and protections) about such actions due to terrorism/infiltration concerns. Yet there's Gambit and Logan flying right in ... COME ON!!
Unless I missed something, Emma Frost -- whose skin can turn into diamond -- was housed in a ... steel cage?? She couldn't break out of that?? COME ON!! (By the way, when did she get such powers? I know this was established in the comics, but when did she move from a mentalist to diamond-hard skin?)
How come Sabretooth didn't recognize Wolverine in "X-Men"?? Sure, Logan's memories are shot, but 'Tooth's?? COME ON!!

Liev Schreiber ("The Manchurian Candidate"), who plays Sabretooth, is by far the best of the cast. His lust for blood and killing are aptly portrayed. And the chick who plays Logan's squeeze (Lynn Collins)? YOWSAH!!

Why Cap's shield is indestructible

2009-04-30T18:48:00.012-04:00

I never consistently collected The Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe. Only issues that tickled my fancy. One of these was #15 -- the "Book of Weapons, Hardware, and Paraphernalia." I mean, who wouldn't want to get the scoop on all those cool gadgets utilized by Marvel's greatest?

The section on Iron Man is awesome enough (and why wouldn't it be -- the book is largely done by Eliot Brown, the same dude who did the terrific Iron Manual), but there's also things you'd [possibly] never even consider: Stilt Man's systems, Deathlok's cybernetics, Dr. Spectrum's Power Prism, and Mockingbird's battle staves. And at issue's end, there's a cool page devoted to two of Marvel's unique inventions: Adamantium and Vibranium. Any true Marvelite knows that Adamantium is what Wolverine's claws (and bones) are composed of, and that Vibranium is found only in Wakanda, home of the Black Panther.

What many Marvelites may not know is that Captain America's vaunted shield is ... composed of both these substances!

[Dr. Myron] MacLain began experimenting with the process that creates Adamantium as a young scientist in the employ of the United States government in the 1940s. By accident he created a special adamantium compound which is more nearly indestructible than any form of adamantium created ever since, and then through another accident, fused this adamantium sample he had created with a sample of an unknown metal which is now known to have been Wakandan Vibranium. The result was the large rounded specimen of alloy which is the most virtually indestructible substance known to man. This alloy specimen was given to Captain America to serve as his shield. The exact chemical composition of Captain
America's shield and the exact degree to which it is indestructible have never
been determined, nor has MacLain or anyone else ever learned how to duplicate
either the special Adamantium compound used in the creation of the shield, which
is known as Proto-Adamantium, or the process which fused the Proto-Adamantium to the Wakandan Vibranium.

All emphases mine.

And there you have it. Cap's shield is made of an Adamantium even stronger than that usually used in the Marvel Universe! It's stronger than Wolverine's claws and bones, tougher than Ultron's body, and harder than the Constrictor's coils. (Read the whole Handbook entry on Adamantium here.)

Take that, Count Nefaria! "Mere scrap of metal," old man?? HA!

Hidden gems

2009-04-27T16:03:00.001-04:00

OK, we all know about the popular classic comics, the issues that are must-haves that everyone knows about. Issues like X-Men #137, or Giant-Size X-Men #1, or Incredible Hulk #181, or Avengers #4. (You don't really need me to tell what's "classic" about these comics, do 'ya?) But every now and then, an issue will come out that remains "under the radar," yet is truly a piece of comics mastery.

Such is the case with Iron Man #78 from 1974. This was actually a "filler" issue (Marvel did this a lot back in the day when a deadline could not be met) but ended up becoming one of Shellhead's best single-issue tales ever. Written by Bill Mantlo and drawn by Iron Man stalwart George Tuska, "Long Time Gone" is a "flashback" yarn detailing one of Iron Man's adventures in Vietnam towards that conflict's end.

Tony Stark is pondering the life-changing event -- his company's transition from arms manufacturing to more "peaceful" means -- and a pivotal instance (perhaps the instance) is when Shellhead jets to a site in 'Nam where one of Stark's new weapons, a satellite-guided "super" gun, is about to be tested. Mantlo and Tuska perfectly capture the ambience of the situation -- G.I.s appearing war-weary yet resigned to their jobs and asking Iron Man about news from home, and them being tickled pink to actually meet in person an Avenger -- and then up the ante when the commander Shellhead is talking to is suddenly picked off by an enemy sniper.

Iron Man quickly assumes charge of the situation, ordering the G.I.s to fire Stark's gun pronto! He then jets into the air to confront some North Vietnamese jets ... and is severely wounded by an exploding missile! He crashed to the ground and remains unconscious for hours. When he awakens, he notices his chestplate is damaged, and he needs a quick charge. In that regard, a jeep's battery sends an electric shock through Stark's body, knocking him out for still more hours. When he awakens again, he makes his way back to the American troops ... only to realize they're all dead. A Viet Cong armed with a machine gun suddenly opens fire on Iron Man, whereupon Shellhead whacks him across the field with an open-faced thrust. When he approaches the enemy to show him what his side has done, the guerrilla utters "Please?" and Iron Man then realizes that the young man is ... blind.

Attempting to get the young man home, Iron Man witnesses the results of his new satellite gun's effectiveness: Total and utter destruction. The lad's Vietnamese village has been completely demolished.

As an ... epitaph, Iron Man jets skyward and activates his repulsors -- aimed at the ground. His objective? To carve out the word "WHY" in the dirt:

A few panels later, Shellhead hoists the young man onto his back and escorts him to safety. Mantlo & Tuska's panel is pure artistry:

If you manage to complete the issue with completely dry eyes, you're a ... well, I was going to say "better," but let's just say you're a more stoic person than I am.

Iron Man #78 -- a truly hidden gem.

Geometrically challenged (and irresponsible) 1980s comics ads

2009-04-23T19:24:00.007-04:00

OK, how 'bout this Cracker Jack ad I [re]discovered in Marvel Two-In-One #86 from 1982:

OK, no -- the coach didn't really say that (as if you couldn't tell via my pathetic Photoshopping), but can you imagine an ad like this being approved for publication today??

Then there's the next panel:

How freakin' far is it from the pitcher's mound to home plate on this field?? About six feet?? What sort of reaction time does poor Scottie have to get even half a swing of his bat?? SHEESH!!

The "Heroes Reborn" Iron Man armor -- better than you remember

2009-04-21T21:07:00.000-04:00

Still keeping with the current theme of recent posts, Marvel's Golden Avenger underwent one of his more controversial changes in armor with the debut of Iron Man (volume 2) #1. This armor, technically dubbed the "Prometheum Armor," is usually despised by fans as it's not very aesthetically pleasing. I agree with that assessment a little; however, what I think is best about this armor is that it is, by far, the most realistically designed armor in the history of the character.

Look at the pic at left, taken from the cover of IM (vol. 2) #1. The most notable aspect of this suit is the "smokestacks" located on the back. I happen to think they look pretty intimidating, but that aside, their real purpose is a heat sink -- they dissipate the prodigious amount of heat the armor produces during every standard use (and beyond). Heat sinks were also noted (in various panels of volume 2 issues) on the armor's gauntlets and knee segments.

The golden coils are also much more realistic than anything we've seen Iron Man wear before. It's much easier to understand how they would bend and stretch rather than a pattern of contiguous armor. In actuality, these coils are the armor; the crimson plating is "mere" additional armor, but also houses power units, weapons, defensive counter-measures, and medical needs. (Stark's heart was critically injured -- again -- in volume 2's premiere issue.) Quite realistically conceived.

As you may know, Tony Stark himself wasn't planning to wear the Prometheum Armor as told in issue #1. He only did so out of medical necessity after an accident (much like -- surprise! -- Tales of Suspense #39). Stark's good friend Rebel O'Reilly had been doing all the armor's preliminary tests, until battle damage caused one of the protoypes to explode, killing him. What you may not know is how then-writer Scott Lobdell came up with the character -- and name -- Rebel. He based it on legendary Iron Man creator Bob Layton: R.e.B.e.L. = Robert "Bob" Layton. This little tidbit was bequeathed by Scott to yours truly back during my Advanced Iron editing days!

Rebel was "resurrected" a few years later in Heroes Reborn: Rebel. HYDRA had "revived" Reb (remember -- no character ever stays dead in comics ... ever) and outfitted him with a modified Prometheum Armor (on which he was dependent for his very life, too, natch) to go and kill 'ol buddy Tony Stark. He didn't succeed, needless to say.

Total hackery; or, how in the hell did Rob Liefeld get this gig?

2009-04-19T09:51:00.029-04:00

Picking up on the theme from this post, I just pulled out Captain America (volume 2) #1 from the long box. And all I can say is ... well, just what the title says: How in the hell did Rob Liefeld get that "Heroes Reborn" gig? Cap vol. 2 #1 is just horrendous -- a ridiculous homage to one of Marvel's greatest heroes and an accepted symbol of the United States. It's bad enough that Liefeld's story is wooden, superficial and hollow; it's insane how bad his art is.

In this "reimagining," Steve Rogers has a sort of amnesia and has been "looked after" by government highers-up, notably SHIELD's Nick Fury. Granted, I never collected all of volume 2 Cap (why would I waste my money?), but from what I've read, Cap, in the waning days of World War II, vehemently disagreed with President Truman's decision to drop the atomic bomb and was essentially "deactivated" from service, which included being given a new life and sort of a "mind-wipe" (hence the "amnesia"). In the premiere issue, Steve is haunted by nightmares from his "forgotten" past, and notices a gentleman warching him as he goes to and from work. Steve's job is a seemingly ho-hum factory gig, until one day the guy ("Abe") who has been watching him confronts him. He takes him to a hidden cellar in a building and gives him back ... his shield!! But, of course, there are some mysterious operatives who're right there in an attempt to capture said shield.

And here is where we see Liefeld's total disdain for any sense of artistic proportionality. Check out the two panels below: In the first we see Steve Rogers standing right next to Abe; notice Rogers is about a head taller than Abe. However, in the second, Rogers is a miraculous half a body length taller than Abe!

And that's only the beginning. Being a superhero means that Rogers' physique isn't gonna change when he's dressed in civvies. But when Liefeld's on the pencils ... it does!! Check out Rogers' build (top left corner) compared to that of his co-workers below:

It looks the least muscular of the four seated!! But a bit later, when Rogers recovers his shield thanks to Abe, we see this:

In this "Liefeld-verse" Captain America, somehow the star-spangled Avengers' shield is endowed with mystical abilities that enable its wielder to suddenly increase his muscular body mass by staggering proportions!!

Speaking of staggering proportions, if these next set of panels don't cause you to utter a big "WTF!!??" then I don't know what will. In the scenes where we're introduced to upcoming Cap partner Rikki Barnes, we see her brother and ... friend:

How is it even remotely possible to look like that?? The dude's arms are almost twice the size of Barnes' brother's torso!! And where does this ... person buy his clothes?? I mean, check out his shoes, among other items:

His sneakers are almost the size of Rikki Barnes!!! What sort of store would even sell footwear like that??

One of Cap's enemies is intro'd this ish, the aptly named Master Man. Now see if you can guess which is Master Man's mug and which is that of Steve Rogers at left. OK, it's not really fair as one of them has a receding hairline, and we all know that it's not Steve Rogers! But I mean, c'mon -- this Liefeld ... "scowl" is seen ad nauseum in any Liefeld-penciled book. Don't believe me? Well there it is again -- Master Man, in another panel -- at right.

How is that a natural grimace? Who actually curls their upper and lower lips like that to show their choppers that way??

The bad guys (of whom Master Man is but one) are mostly unreformed Nazis left over from World War II. Master Man (and a dude who goes by the name Red Skull, not seen in this ish) have set up shop in Philadelphia (the birthplace of the United States -- get it?) and have established a political organization called the World Party. The World Party is the Nazi Party, "repackaged" as sort of an "anti-immigration" political force.

First, who the hell would follow a political party's leader that's dressed like Master Man?? Second, what, if any, credibility would any political organization have in the United States if it was adorned with the Nazi swastika?? Ah, but you see, this is Liefeld-verse where, if ordinary people can have physiques like those seen above (and/or magically change them when they discover a certain non-mystical object!), why not a powerful democracy that somehow would "welcome" an openly fascist force? Or, perhaps, this is Liefeld's attempt at "getting in tight" with the then-incoming cadre of "progressive" Marvel writers ... folks like Mark Millar, J. Michael Straczynski, et. al. (The thing is, though, that incoming cadre, despite their outspoken leftism, did it so much better than poor Rob.)

And to top this inanity off, how in the f*** did the World Party manage to smuggle nuclear weapons ... into a Philadelphia church???

Look at that -- we're not talking about tactical nukes, something that could be smuggled into a suitcase or assembled in the back of a van. The panel above shows five -- count 'em, five -- fully assembled intercontinental ballistic missiles -- sitting in the basement of a church. In Philadelphia.

Boy, that "Heroes Reborn" Nick Fury and SHIELD sure were doing a bang-up job protecting America from nuclear terrorism, eh? Couldn't notice that freakin' ICBMs were being assembled right in one of the US's largest metropolises!! That's what happens when you're too concerned with a former American icon regaining his memory, I guess!

From what I've read, after a few issues of "Heroes Reborn," Marvel attempted to renegotiate its contracts with Liefeld and Jim Lee (to pay them less money). Lee agreed; Liefeld refused. How d'ya like that? The clearly greater of the two talents (by magnitudes, too) went along with it, but the total hack said "no."

Go figure that one out.

O.P.P. -- One Panel of Pain

2009-04-17T12:04:00.001-04:00

Here is this week's submission for the SpaceBooger One Panel of Pain!

That's Piledriver of the Wrecking Crew getting plowed by a crane operated by Nighthawk (off panel). And yep, that's Luke Cage below who had temporarily joined up with the irregular group! This panel is courtesy of Defenders (vol. 1) #18 from 1974 -- written by Len Wein and penciled by Sal Buscema. (Couldn't 'ya tell? There's that classic trademark "Buscema spittle" between Piledriver's teeth!)

The issue is an all-out slug fest! If you like non-stop action, this ish is for you.

Simply ... the worst

2009-04-14T11:47:00.006-04:00

Back in 1996 Marvel did something which certainly increased sales, but certainly degraded comics storytelling. They "leased" out four of their characters' titles (The Avengers, Fantastic Four, Iron Man and Captain America) to Image's Jim Lee and Rob Liefeld. This, as you're probably familiar, was known as "Heroes Reborn." Lee's responsibility -- FF and Iron Man -- did well, and their stories were ... well, OK. Liefeld, on the other hand, proved again how vastly overrated a "talent" he is.

Example: Avengers volume 2, #1. Rarely has there been a combination of piss-poor storytelling whose artwork is supposed to "compensate" for it. I mean, c'mon -- all you have to do is weave a slightly modified story of established characters and backstory -- and you still manage to f*** it up? That takes some talent. Or rather, serious lack thereof. To start with, who the hell came up with the choice of team members? And their outfits? Let's see ... Captain America, the Vision, Hawkeye, Scarlet Witch, and ... Swordsman?? Hellcat??? WTF?? Why go with two characters who were at best very marginal characters in Avengers lore? Oooh ... is this how Liefeld staked out his ... "originality" on the title? Cheeyeah, right.

I mean, whoa. What is up with Wanda's costume?

This looks even worse than her original one -- to which this is an homage. Albeit a very lame one.

Then there's Hawkeye:

Kurt Busiek busted on this pathetic outfit in early volume 3 Avengers, having Clint Barton himself remarking that he looked like a "brown Plantman."

Then there's the Swordsman. Hilariously, in an early panel we see him primping in front of a mirror saying "Face it, Swordsman, you do cut one mean figure of a man!" Well, if Chap Yaep or Liefeld himself are on art chores, you can be sure that any "figure" will be grossly exaggerated so as easily to be "mean." But c'mon -- how attractive can a guy be when he wears his hair like Moe Howard, for cripe's sake?

Then there might be the biggest "heresy" of all -- Liefeld changing the "A" on Cap's headgear to an eagle logo. And indeed it was a heresy -- so much so that later on in the volume two issues of the Hereos Reborn characters the "A" found its way back to the Captain's head!

But back to what I stated at the onset: Heroes Reborn degraded comics storytelling. Yep, that's what I said. Overall, but especially with the Liefeld-helmed titles, big "flashy" panels with ridiculously exaggerated physiques filled the pages, and actual written text was diminished by several orders of magnitude. For example, back in 1997, Bill Egan, former editor-in-chief of Advanced Iron -- the online Iron Man fan magazine -- did an analysis of the average number panels per page, total number of panels in the book, as well as the average/total number of words per page/book. He compared volume 2 Iron Man to Acclaim's X-O Manowar. Here's what he found:

Average # of panels per page: IM: 3.18; X-O: 4.5
Total # of panels: IM: 70; X-O: 99
Average # of words per page: IM: 38.9; X-O: 136.23
Total # of words: IM: 856; X-O: 2997.

As Bill wrote then (in Advanced Iron #34, by the way, if you're interested in downloading the issue -- as you can with any issue of the ultimate Iron Man fan experience),

"For a 28% increase in price (X-O Manowar), we're getting a 41% increase in the number of panels (with possibly better artwork) and a whopping 250% increase in the number of words!! Any way you slice it we're getting way more bang for the buck with X-O Manowar than in Iron Man."

Liefeld's story and Jim Valentino's script in Avengers vol. 2 #1 are so basic, so cliché ridden, and so devoid of character development as to be a prodigious head-shaker. They can't decide whether to make the Swordsman a smart aleck like Hawkeye, or some well-spoken elitist. Hawkeye's snappy patter is childish and forced. Hellcat and Wanda are such a waste of time as to be virtually insignificant. And how does the team accept Thor immediately into the team after he's been "on ice" for millenia, not to mention having fought the team ferociously a few seconds upon his "awakening?" I'd expect this from a shortly-after-the-birth-of-Marvel 1960s Stan Lee penned book, but not a 1996 reimagining.

And then there's Yaep's and Liefeld's ... "art." It's miserable. (See this past post of mine for more on Liefeld's "talents.") Liefeld has long been the butt of jokes for his ridiculous anatomy (and rightly so) and he doesn't disappoint us here. For example, check out the panel at left of the Enchantress. What -- did she have stilt implants?

And WTF is up with the two-page spread (Image-ites never do anything small) of Thor attacking Cap? Where is Thor's torso? His legs appear to be growing directly out of his neck! That's not to mention the ridiculously shaped fists and inane angle of attack:

Lastly there's the panel that's really beyond parody: Thor's hammer (Mjolnir) with its inscription ... in English!!

Avengers volume 2 #1 -- simply the worst!

The greatest of all Marvel epics

2009-04-11T10:47:00.004-04:00

(Here's a post I wrote almost two years ago at my other blog. But I just reread the K/S War again, and felt compelled to "reprint" this ...)

Don't be shanghaied into believing that wannabe comic "greats" like Mark Millar and/or Bryan Hitch and their Marvel works are some of the "best of all-time." Take Marvel's recent "Civil War" er, "epic." Great? Yuck. It wasn't even good. The only reason such "events" are dubbed "epics" is because they include virtually every title in the Marvel catalogue and they make a ton of dough as a result. The storytelling? Well, that's another matter. Hell, today's creative teams don't even have the term "deadline" to deal with anymore. You can wait months for an issue that used to take a mere 30 days. The only modern creator worth his salt is Kurt Busiek (more on him later), but he hasn't done anything for Marvel in a few years.

Ah, the halcyon days of the Marvel Comics Group. Take me back to ... the early 1970s ...

... and the truly epic "Kree-Skrull War." Written by longtime Marvel stalwart Roy Thomas and drawn by the phenomenal Neal Adams and John Buscema, the KSW featured the Marvel Universe's two biggest alien races "battlin' it out for the Earth" (to quote former Hulk and Capt. America sidekick Rick Jones). The issues have all been collected in what's known as a "trade paperback;" however, Marvel also put out a two-issue "special edition" back in 1983 (somewhat more streamlined than the modern trade paperback) and that's what I own. I actually prefer these two issues instead of the TPB because it features a perfect commentary by writer Alan Zelentz in the prologue. He says that the KSW "is an epic so grand, only the comics could bring it to you!" And back in 1983 (and for many years thereafter), he was right. (Today's relatively cheap CGI could probably do a nice version of it and go right to DVD. Hey ...!!!) You can read all of Zelentz's commentary here.

Smack dab in the middle of the Kree and Skrulls -- Earth's Mightiest Heroes, the Avengers! Actually, the very Earth itself is "smack dab in the middle" -- in the middle of the two intergalactic empires (um, that's the Kree Empire and the Skrull Empire, natch.) In true astronomical terms, this is highly improbable as the Kree Empire is located in the Greater Magellanic Cloud (approx. 160,000 light years distant), and the Skrulls are HQ'd in the Andromeda Galaxy (some two million light years away). But hey, why let such a piddly detail spoil all the fun? The KSW had been going on for untold millenia, and now that humans on Earth were evolving at a more advanced pace than either Kree or Skrull suspected, both races were determined to either possess our planet -- or destroy it.

Thomas' writing is utterly impeccable as he weaves through various [past] Marvel storylines with perfection. Adams' artwork is so realistic you feel as if you're actually a living witness to the events. Science fiction movie aspects abound with a hat tip to the classic "Fantastic Voyage" and a foreshadow to the then still-to-come "Star Wars." But perhaps best of all, it's one of Marvel's regular joes that saves the day. Rick Jones, teenage wannabe rock star, Incredible Hulk sidekick, and former Capt. America confidante, is abducted by a Kree soldier and taken back to their home planet. The Kree Supreme Intelligence -- a monstrous grotesque head composed of the greatest minds in Kree history -- awakens in Rick dormant mental powers which allow the Avengers -- and Earth, as a consequence -- to be victorious, and the Kree-Skrull scuffle to end (for the nonce).

The aforementioned Kurt Busiek added to this awesome epic almost three decades later in what is in my opinion the second greatest Marvel epic of all-time -- "Avengers Forever" (premiere issue at left). Busiek uses Jones' mental powers -- now dubbed the "Destiny Force" -- as a prize fought over by long-time Avengers foes Immortus and Kang the Conqueror. It helps if you're an Avengers fan to really enjoy Kurt's tale, but if not, Busiek's affection for continuity is sure to make you one. That, and artist Carlos Pacheco's pencils are truly spectacular.

"AF" plucks various Avengers from the Marvel timestream to deal with the threat of Immortus who, it turns out, has the means to erase whole timelines that he has deemed "dangerous." Again, Busiek meticulously weaves aspects of Marvel yore throughout the twelve-issue tale, including even lesser known "What If?" tales (most intriguingly for me, one that included an apocryphal 1950s Avengers team).

Both the "Kree-Skrull War" and "Avengers Forever" are available as mass market trade paperback collections and are easy to find. I highly recommend them.

O.P.P. -- One Panel of Pain, March 27

2009-03-27T17:31:00.002-04:00

It's that time of the week, the One Panel of Pain hosted by Spacebooger.

Our entry for this week is from Aliens: Hive #2, from 1992:

That's some serious pain, yo.

Superhero Cookbook

2009-03-21T12:40:00.001-04:00

The lovely Ms. Anonymous Opinion sends me word of a hilarious comics offering, originally published in 1981 -- the DC Superheroes Super Healthy Cookbook!

Check it out and then sigh out a big "WTF??" Still, I dig the panels' inks; reminds me a lot of former Spidey great Ross Andru.

Documented Aliens, part 3

2009-03-19T17:03:00.000-04:00

One of the more outstanding “Aliens” tales comes from 1997’s Aliens Special #1. The second (longer) part of the issue is the story “Elder Gods” by Nancy Collins. Here, we actually get a glimpse of the timeframe by which humans have spread across the stars in the Aliens-verse. “Elder Gods” states that the story occurs in the “last year of the 21st century” (2099 or 2100 depending on how technical you get) and that humanity has been journeying to other planets for “over 75 years.” That means interstellar travel began in 2024-25 on Earth in the Aliens-verse. Can you imagine starships in less than a quarter century? Only if we get lucky and have a major scientific breakthrough … or successfully reverse engineer an alien (lower case) craft.

At any rate, “Elder Gods” takes place on planet Mira Ceti IV. (It is interesting to note that the star[s] in the Mira Ceti system – a binary system, like the majority of star systems – is/are 350 light years distant, meaning human faster-than-light propulsion systems must be pretty damn good!) The Omni Tech company (obviously not The Company of “Alien” film fame) is busy scuttling the planet for its mineral wealth. Many of the workers employed by O.T. are quite eccentric, most especially so, perhaps, the cult which worships the 20th century horror writer Horace Payne Lovecraft. (The story has his last name as "Loveless;" however, Google provides virtually no information on a "Horace Payne Loveless" other than this very Aliens tale. Perhaps it is a late 21st century bastardization of his real name.) This cult, called the Esoterics and led by one Father Lumley, is sent on a mineral extraction mission by the higher-ups at the O.T. compound, and this doesn’t sit well with the good Father. Nevertheless, the company’s Chief Architect quotes Lumley his employment contract, and soon the Father and his flock are on their way miles from the compound.

A couple weeks into their quarry detail, a worker discovers something quite interesting: The top of the head of an Alien queen! About another week later, the entire creature is unearthed, and a tunnel below it is found. Father Lumley and his followers believe that they have discovered the “Crypt of Tulitu” (also referred to as “Cthulhu”) The old Alien nest is a near-perfect analogy to Lovecraft’s visions – horror beyond imagining. Lumley and the cult approach the cadre of Alien eggs and … !

A day later, the Esoterics return to the Omni Tech base, totally ignoring the demands of the Chief Architect to inform her as to why they are back from their mission so soon. That night, the cult plants the Alien eggs they have brought back with them throughout the company camp. The next day, all of the Esoterics are found mutilated, their chests somehow ... exploded from within! Except Father Lumley – he’s still alive, but in agony. He mutters some Lovecraft-laden swill … while chest-burster erupts from his torso! Soon after, mature Aliens surround and attack the compound workers!

The colony administrators realize they’re in deep doo-doo. The Chief Architect awoke with a sore throat (hello, facehugger!), the Esoterics are massacred, and now horrendous creatures are all over the place! It’s just a matter of time before the colony is ransacked by the Aliens …

The inks by John Stokes (over Leif Jones' pencils) are really what give this macabre tale its “umph.” The panel at the above left is a perfect example; just marvel at the utter madness on the guy’s face – this, in the midst of the Alien takeover of the colony! Also, during and after the Esoterics’ discovery of the Alien queen, Stokes' shadows are eerie and disturbing. At right is a glimpse of Father Lumley descending the ladder of his craft after returning to the Omni Tech base (and following his Alien implantation). His facial expression is determined and creepy at the same time. Perfect for this distressing Aliens tale!

“Elder Gods” is a must read for any true-blue Aliens fan.

Documented Aliens, part 2

2009-03-17T15:22:00.000-04:00

As I mentioned in my previous "Aliens" post, virtually every comics tale about the evil insectoids involves some clandestine, sinister attempt to control and/or make use of the creatures. Which, I suppose, is understandable since the original movie ("Alien") alluded to the "Company" somehow knowing about the dastardly species (recall the android Ash telling the survivors before he was terminated how they were to "bring back a specimen ... all other orders rescinded ... crew expendable"). This doesn't seem to jibe with what we saw in the sequel "Aliens" as the slimy Burke sends the colonists who've settled on the planet (that Ripley and the Nostromo crew landed on) to the derelict "Space Jockey" starship once the rescued Ripley tells all about 'em. The fact that he did so indicates that the Company had no previous knowledge of the Aliens, else it would have sent a ship there long before allowing any colonists to settle.

In "Alien 3" we see at film's end a team from the Company arrive at the prison compound. It's here we get a clue to the Company's moniker: Weyland-Yutani. It's there to collect the Alien queen with which Ripley has been impregnated. Lastly, in "Alien Resurrection," the entire premise of the flick is scientists working to harvest Alien specimens from a cloned Ripley.

The comics keep this up. One of the first limited series after Mark Verheiden's original trilogy is Aliens: Genocide. Earth has been cleared of the Alien scourge, but good 'ol human greed just doesn't ever seem to die! A new drug made from the Aliens' royal jelly is all the rage, and the wealthy entrepreneur behind it finances a trip back to the Alien homeworld to gather more so he can perfect the composition! Of course there is some clandestine shenanigans afoot, leading to numerous deaths. But perhaps "best" of all, the Aliens are going through a "civil war" -- a mutant offshoot of the race has developed and challenges the standard bearer. The entrepreneur's sojourn arrives right smack-dab in the middle of this all-out donneybrook! Genocide makes neat use of Verheiden's invention of an Alien queen, her "elite guard," and the Alien royal jelly.

Speaking of royal jelly, Aliens: Hive follows up on the quest for the magical substance. Here, a scientist who developed a cybernetic ant to study [Earth] ant culture is persuaded by a beautiful thief to build a similar robotic Alien in order to infiltrate an Alien hive. Why? To get that royal jelly, of course! Hive is rather ho-hum as far as "Aliens" stories go; however, it features some of the creepiest Alien-on-human attack panels ever seen in "Aliens" comics. One panel has an Alien thrusting its secondary jaw through the back of a guy's head -- and coming out the other side through his open mouth. In another, an Alien just jams his his whole head into a dude's abdomen -- his internal munchers protruding through the poor soul's back! In a word: Ouch.

Be warned that the artwork in both Genocide and Hive is below par. Damon Willis' pencils in the former seem way out of place for an "Aliens" story -- too clean with well rounded lines, they're better suited for a superhero yarn. Kelley Jones' art in Hive are grittier and heavier, more suited to the genre. However, he's very inconsistent with portraying the characters. The female lead, Gill, vascillates from beautiful to butch tomboyish, which makes the reader wonder why in the world main character Dr. Mayakovsky has a thing for her.

Documented Aliens, part 1

2009-03-16T17:30:00.015-04:00

In my opinion, Dark Horse’s best title has been their exploration of the “Aliens” universe – that which began with the scary-as-sh** 1979 film starring Sigourney Weaver. Seven years later, James Cameron upped the ante with “Aliens.” It’s really hard to decide which film is “better” because they’re two distinct films. The original is virtually a pure horror film, while the sequel is almost a pure actioner. (“Alien 3” and “Alien Resurrection” don’t even get mentioned because they’re pretty atrocious.)

The first big comics adventure into the Alien-verse was titled simply Aliens: Book One. Written by Mark Verheiden – who’s gone on to write for some pretty noteworthy projects, not the least of which is SciFi Channel’s “Battlestar Galactica” – it picks up fairly soon after the “Aliens” film. Newt, the girl Sigourney Weaver (aka Ripley) rescued, is now in a mental hospital, while Corporal Hicks has been virtually shunned by everybody, his acid burn scars leaving folks wondering if he is contagious and/or infected with some Alien germ. Meanwhile, the government has discovered the Alien homeworld. But so has the devious “Company.” And that means one thing: Bring back some specimens so it can [somehow] market the damn things! But better yet, a derelict spacecraft has made its way back to Earth orbit, one its pilots with an Alien “facehugger” attached to him. Uh-oh.

The Company takes the pilot into possession and keeps close tabs on him. And wouldn’t ‘ya know it? He’s impregnated with a queen. How lucky for the company! Of course, they keep the queen sequestered and allow it to lay eggs at will, which they hope to eventually use as weapons. Somehow. Meanwhile, the government organizes a mission to the Alien homeworld. Unbeknownst to it, the Company has jetted off its own craft right behind the military one. That Company is just too damn greedy!

You can imagine what follows: The imprisonment of the Alien queen goes awry, and the Company mission to the Alien homeworld has disastrous effects on the government’s mission. Oh, and did I mention a live alien – no, not the ant-like monsters which the films are named after, but one of the race we saw in that derelict craft from the original film (the “Space Jockey” in Alien parlance) -- makes an appearance? Yep. And its intentions aren’t good.

Verheiden’s script and dialogue are masterful, while artist Mark Nelson’s black and white pencils are gritty and detailed, not to mention not for the faint of heart.

Aliens: Book Two picks up right after Book One. Verheiden continues with the scripting chore, while Denis Beauvais handles art. The pencils aren’t as strong as Nelson’s, but his painting adds a neat touch. In this yarn, Earth has been overrun by the Aliens, and a rogue element of the military, now situated on another planet, is doing what the Company had attempted in Book One – that is, control and even train the Aliens to do their bidding.

(And that’s the overriding theme of virtually all the Aliens stories to one degree or another: Some “rogue” or unscrupulous group or individual -- usually a "mad scientist" -- has some "secret plan" for the Alien(s). But hell, even after the events of Book One and Book Two, nobody freakin' learns a damn thing! Much more on this in another post!)

Thankfully, our hero(ine) from the first two movies arrives at the end of Book Two -- Ripley. She has a plan to eradicate the Alien scourge from our home planet, and it involves snatching a "queen mother" from the [presumed] homeworld. This plays out in the third chapter, Aliens: Earth War.

Earth War continues the excellent writing of Verheiden; however, art chores this time out are done by Sam Keith. And needless to say, his pencils are pretty atrocious. This is a real shame as the climax of Verheiden's trilogy deserves much better -- because Ripley's plan proves successful. Well, it appears that way! The concept of an Alien "queen mother" and her "elite guard" ups the genre ante nicely, and is used in subsequent Aliens tales.

Oh, and what about that "Space Jockey" alien who appeared in Book One? He's not been forgotten, natch. He has his own plan for Earth -- terraforming it for his own people's purposes! Unfortunately, Ripley and Co. can't do much to stop him. But, despite the US government being as corrupt as the Company that essentially runs it in this future-era, it still is a force to be reckoned with.

And it shows just this in Earth War's continuation via Dark Horse Presents: Aliens #1. In the book's last story, "The Alien," John Arcudi details the US's plan to thwart the "Space Jockey" alien from making our Big Blue Marble his new home. Unfortunately for the president of that future-time, it involves him being impregnated with an Alien! The prez is summoned by the "Space Jockey" to apparently discuss terms, but just as the latter realizes there is plotting afoot, the prez sips a small amount of liquid hidden in a molar of his -- causing the Alien within him to burst out of his chest! The "Space Jockey" fears the Aliens more than anything, and it quickly becomes distraught with utter fear! Thus distracted, the military launches a salvo of ICBMs at the "Space Jockey's" spacecraft, annihilating it!

"The Alien" also shows that Ripley's efforts to destroy the Alien scourge from Earth was only partially successful. We see the US president monitoring TV sets showing Alien activity across the planet. But it is substantially less than what it was before Ripley's plan in Earth War.

New readers should be aware that Dark Horse changed the names of [some of] the main characters in the Verheiden-scripted trilogy. After the debut of the "Alien 3" film, in which Corporal Hicks and Newt were killed, the publisher altered the names so that the stories would still be relevant to the film franchise. (For what it's worth, Hicks became "Wilks" while Newt changed to "Billie.") The first two stories also got actual titles instead of just number designations. But you can still find the originals via the usual sites, like eBay.

1970s comics ads: The Money Maker

2009-03-15T19:42:00.014-04:00

One of the best things about Silver and Bronze Age comics is the hilarious ads that litter the pages between panels (and I mean that in a cheesy good way). For the inaugural ad post for C.o.R. I've chosen ... the Money Maker! From 1977's The Incredible Hulk #214, Gandalf Products Co. showed young comics aficionados how to play Willem DaFoe in To Live and Die in L.A.!

Just insert a blank piece of paper into the machine, and PRESTO! You can now fool that cretin behind the counter at the neighborhood 7-11 when you pay for that pack of Bubble Yum!

I can tell 'ya, boy, do I feel like a dolt for shelling out all those quarters as a boy for the latest Marvels, when all I hadda do was print out a couple singles and voilá -- I could'a had eight issues for "free!" Then again, I seem to recall an incident that dissuaded me from such shenanigans:

Excuse us, Mr. Hube. We're from the
Treasury Dept. Can we have a word?

I watched "Watchmen"

2009-03-13T17:51:00.005-04:00

Finally. And you know what? I liked everything -- right up until the freakin' ending.

If you haven't see the movie or read the graphic novel, stop reading this right now -- 'cuz I'm going to talk about things that contain SPOILERS, natch!

The movie stayed remarkably true to Moore's and Gibbons' phenomenal work of comic art. In fact, in my estimation, I'd say at least 50% of the dialogue (if my memory serves me) came directly from the comics. As such, I thought the movie worked perfectly ... right up until the ending.

The "villain" of the story is Adrian Veidt, aka Ozymandias, who through various machinations has implemented a plan to thwart impending nuclear war and bring the nations of the world together. In the comics, Veidt enlists the aid of artists and geneticists (among others) to construct a ghastly "alien" creature with a brain cloned from a psychic sensitive. Just as his fellow Watchmen happen upon Veidt's lair in Antarctica, Adrian's already set his plan in motion. What he does is monstrous: He teleports the behemoth creature to New York City where it materializes inside and around various buildings and infrastructure. The resultant "shock" of this obviously brutally painful action causes the creature to send out a massive psychic "shockwave," killing about three million New Yorkers.

Up until this point, the United States and the USSR were on the brink of nuclear war. But now, this "alien attack" upon the human race serves to unite humanity against a common foe! It was precisely what Veidt had intended! Fellow Watchmen Silk Spectre, Night Owl and Dr. Manhattan can only accept the cold logic that Veidt has forced upon them.

The movie misses this very important point. The film has Veidt conjuring up a scenario whereby he frames Dr. Manhattan for destroying large portions of not only New York City, but numerous other metropolises around the world. The "attack" by the "mad" Dr. Manhattan supposedly serves to unite humanity in place of the original graphic novel plot. But it doesn't make sense.

Here's why: For his entire career, Dr. Manhattan was an operative of the United States government. In both the comic and film, we see Manhattan annihilating Vietnamese troops in that war, as well as serving as a huge intimidation factor against the Soviets. As such, why would the Soviets, not to mention other unfriendly world powers in particular, suddenly "unite" with the US against Manhattan after Veidt's orchestrated plot? Why wouldn't they be suspicious that it was all just some sort of dastardly plan by the United States? In addition, at the film's conclusion we hear Dan Drieberg (Night Owl) tell Laurie Juspeczyk (Silk Spectre) that the new, imposed world peace will hold "as long as they all believe Jon (Dr. Manhattan) is watching." However, unless I missed something, there was nothing in Veidt's plan that alluded to Dr. Manhattan destroying those cities as a "warning" to the nations of the world to stop all war.

So, I sat for over two and a half hours of glorious attribution to the only comic in Time magazine's best 100 books of the 20th century, only to have it ruined by a non-sensical ending! And here's another thing: after including so much of the comic in the film -- stuff that could have been left out -- why couldn't they have kept true to the original Veidt plot? In my opinion, they could have easily done so.

As a result of this big let-down, I give "Watchmen" 3 out of 5 stars. It's comics film gold ... right up until the last 20 minutes or so.

Daredevil, Marvel and me

2009-03-12T23:15:00.004-04:00

By way of introduction, I invited myself onboard this blog when Hube first announced it. I do the occasional comics-related post at Delaware Libertarian, but not really enough to support a separate blog.

And--I also have to admit--my interest is pretty limited. While some later works have caught my attention, I am mostly settled into the Silver Age classics, as well as some Golden Age books I used to own as a collector, and a minor interest in the old EC line.

The first comic book I can actually remember buying for myself was Avengers #4 (the revival of Captain America). I still own that copy in VG+ condition, more than forty years later. It's one of four or five out of a collection of nearly 2,000 that didn't bite the dust paying for my graduate education.

Daredevil was one of my first fascinations, and the first comic to which I ever subscribed. I was really bummed when the first issue arrived in the mail box. First off, I never knew that the good old USPS folded the damn books right down the middle of the front cover to mail them. That ticked me off no end.

Then there was the matter of the first issue: Daredevil #43: DD takes on Captain America in one of the more contrived superhero crossover fights of that decade. At Marvel during that period (early 1970s) there were certain artists associated for long, looonnng stretches with the same character. Steve Ditko followed by Johnny Romita on Spider-man. Jack Kirby on Fantastic Four. Gene Colan on Iron Man ... and most especially on Daredevil.

So I was really distressed to discover a bad (and, as far as I know, still unattributed) Jack Kirby cover:

Nor did Colan's style--at least at that point in his career--really do justice to Captain America. Later, when the Captain got his own book, Colan did the pencils (remember the Falcon?) and he was adequate if not brilliant. But I have to admit that my first issue in the mail depressed me.

Possibly it did so because the early legacy of Daredevil contained some important issues. Daredevil #32 ("To Fight the Impossible Fight") concluded a three-issue battle between DD and Mr. Hyde teamed up with the Cobra. Again, the plot of the whole series was, even by Marvel's standards at the time, a Rube Goldberg concoction that didn't bear too much scrutiny. But the schtick of this issue was that DD had actually been blinded by this potion, so he's at the bad guys' mercy. For reasons I can't remember (or would rather forget) they take him out to this lighthouse on an isolated island, and DD manages to kill the power, putting everyone in the dark.

Gene Colan did the ensuing multi-page fight in deep shadow, which the colorist (probably Sol Brodsky, but I'm not sure) complimented with a range of subtle dark blues. It was a chilling, tense segment, one done no justice whatever by this cover...

... but gripping in a way that few issues of the day managed to be.

The early issues of Daredevil have been Wally Wood illustrations: sound but not brilliant. The flowing lines and quirky, impressionistic Colan style fitted him a lot better. At least in costume: some of the law office scenes with Mike Murdoch (sometimes appearing as his own brother Matt), Foggy Nelson, and the ever-too-virginal Karen Page were as painful to look at as they were to read. But two other artists--at least briefly--were associated with early Daredevil, and are worth mentioning.

Johnny Romita (mentioned above in relation to Spider-man) penciled three, maybe four issues in the late teen numbers, including a two-issue story co-starring Spider-man. It was this audition that apparently suggested Romita to Stan Lee as Steve Ditko's successor for the wall-crawler, and this is very likely the first Romita Spider-man image that Marvel fans ever saw:

Likeswise, Barry Smith (before Conan, and before he became Barry Windsor-Smith) did two or three issues when he was in his brief I'm not sure if I want to be Jack Kirby or Jim Steranko, but I don't draw as well as either of them period. (He had already done a single of issue each of X-Men and Nick Fury Agent of SHIELD to almost universal disdain; I can still remember pre-publication howls against his assignment to draw Conan.)

In Issue #54 the Black Panther made an appearance, finishing out a particularly convoluted story-line (made incomprehensible by Smith's lay-outs and poor drawing) that included a villain named Starr Saxon, whom Smith later admitted he intended to draw as flagrantly gay, but lacked the skills to put the gag across. The cover is worse than the interior drawing--but not by much:

The Black Panther always bemused me. Marvel took the name of a radical 1960s civil rights/revolutionary group and turned it into the hero-name for a poor-man's Phantom knock-off, enlightened African King of the Wakanda, the all-around good house Negro. Might as well have called him Captain Sambo.

As I write this, I ask myself, Why in the hell did I like Daredevil? Even then, I knew the writing was bad. The Gene Colan artwork was good, but only on rare occasions great. By the time I subscribed, DD had been pretty much reduced in the Marvel line to second-string Spider-man status.

But I loved that radar sense better than the Spider-sense (Aunt May also creeped me out, if the truth be told), and I liked the red outfit.

More to the point, Daredevil was an adult, not a teenager. I was a teenager when I was reading Daredevil, and frankly I aspired to being an adult with a real job (good-paying, too) like Matt Murdoch. I mean, if you were going to have a secret identity, wouldn't you rather be a successful attorney than geek-boy skulking around the high-school gym?

(I never identified with Robin, either. I think I always knew Bruce was banging him.)

This is more or less what you'll get from me: semi-random and often pretty damn heretical observations on the comics of about 30-40 years ago. Maybe it'll bring back memories, if you are an old fart; or maybe it will help you realize that something really important did happen to comics during the Silver Age, that we hopefully won't forget.

Why it's the best comics blog out there

2009-03-11T21:14:00.004-04:00

Mark Engblom's Comic Coverage. Period. It's posts like these that make it so. Don't just take my word for it! Go there NOW!!

The Botchmen

2009-03-10T21:06:00.007-04:00

OK, I couldn't stop laughing for about five minutes after first seeing this (courtesy Instapundit):

Funniest part? The don't even change the name of "The Comedian" for Joe Biden.

(Cross-posted at The Colossus of Rhodey.)

The OTHER right cross!

2009-03-09T20:11:00.009-04:00

Back in the day (a great Erykah Badu song, by the way) I might've gotten a No-Prize for pointing this out. Check out this panel from 1977's What If (vol. 1) #4 featuring the Invaders:

Here we see the Original Human Torch and his sidekick Toro battling the hordes of the android villain Adam II. It seems the Torch doesn't know his right from his left.

But he can be forgiven. He is an android, after all!

Submitted to the O.P.P. -- One Panel of Pain!

Dullard Wizard

2009-03-08T11:14:00.011-04:00

Many of my favorite [comics] blogs have regular features (like the best comics blog on the 'net, Mark Engblom's Comic Coverage), so who am I to be any different? I'm not a regular Wizard reader (Wizard being the biggest comics news magazine around) but my DC-oriented buddy Brent regularly lends them to me after he's done with 'em. What gets me is that its writers are supposed to be the "ultimate comics geeks," yet at times they make some grievous (grievous in a comics fanboy sense, that is) factual errors. And it's these errors that brings us to CoR's inaugural post of its first regular feature -- the "Dullard Wizard."

March's issue (#209) has a little diddy about Iron Man towards the back of the issue (click on the image for a larger view):

Now, when you're talking Iron Man, you'd better know what you're talkin' about with me around, natch! After all, I did write articles for, and was once editor-in-chief of, Iron Man's premiere fan magazine! As you can see, the segment is about a pivotal moment in Iron Man's history: The one and only time he dramatically changed his armor's color scheme. Iron Man's main armor had always been red and gold (with the very early exceptions of his original armor and then its gold-painted follow-up) so this change to red and silver had many fans aghast. (Not me -- this armor remains my favorite IM armor of all-time.)

But back to the point: Wizard writes that Tony Stark built this new armor in the late 80s in order to fight the [now-classic] "Armor Wars." Nope. Stark built this suit a whole twenty-five issues earlier -- in #200, which was 1985. The "Armor Wars" (which was actually titled "Stark Wars," but that's another story) had not a thing to do with the red and silver suit's construction. In actuality, Stark was piddling around with different armor designs as a form of therapy following his battle with alcoholism (from the late #160s to #182). He remained reluctant to resume wearing armor -- until arch-enemy Obadiah Stane murdered his friend and co-worker Morley Erwin (in #199). Highly pissed off, Stark quickly lost his reservations about becoming Iron Man, donned the new red and silver suit, and kicked Stane's ass!

The red and silver armor (commonly dubbed the "Silver Centurion") was actually seen a bit prior to Iron Man #200 -- in the pages of The West Coast Avengers. It looked a tad different as apparently its final design wasn't settled upon yet.

Ironically, the designer of the suit, classic Iron Man creator Bob Layton, was one of the folks who had a hand in its eventual demise. He and pal David Michelinie, upon reassuming the creative mantle of the title in issue #215, decided the suit was too bulky, and worked in a plot device whereby the suit was causing Tony Stark neurological damage (IM #217). Also ironically, it was during the "Armor Wars" when the Silver Centurion was destroyed (IM #230). This gave Layton and Michelinie the opportunity to return Iron Man to his "true colors," red and gold, in the following issue.

And now you know!

It all began ...

2009-03-08T10:42:00.009-04:00

... over thirty years ago. I got a hold of a coverless comic at the Boothwyn Farmer's Market (Iron Man #69) and I was immediately hooked. Who was this guy in a suit of armor? And the bad guy -- he had ten rings that fired ten different sorts of beams/weapons! (That was, of course, Iron Man's arch nemesis the Mandarin.) Best of all, though, was the overall tone of the editorial pages. They made you feel like a part of a common community: The Marvel "Bullpen," being a "True Believer," the "Mighty Marvel Marching Society" ... not to mention the cool little footnotes throughout the story with wisecracking comments ... all right up this pre-teen's alley!

Yep. And so it began. I was never a "hardcore" collector. I didn't put my growing collection in plastic with backing boards. I just liked to read 'em. Certain titles immediately appealed to me: Iron Man, of course; The Avengers, of whom Iron Man was a key figure; The Fantastic Four; Spider-Man; and The X-Men. Eventually, only the first two became long-term staples. Iron Man was an instant fave because of its hard science fiction aspect; The Avengers because of its constantly changing membership which kept the title "fresh." I built up a decent collection through high school and then college; I pretty much ceased purchases after college as marriage soon beckoned. During my second year of teaching (the early 1990s), my wife told me she wanted me to get rid of some of those boxes of comics I had lying around.

So, I did: I brought them in for some comics-happy students of mine to go through. Just like that my collection was cut by about a third. But one day, after about four years of marriage (still the early 1990s), I stopped into Captain Blue Hen. Oops. I began combing the Iron Man bin to catch up on what I'd been missing. "Ah, the hell with it!" I thought, and grabbed each and every Iron Man issue I needed to "catch up." It was around this time that the Internet was just beginning to blossom. Soon, a site called eBay would come into existence ... ... which I made use of to complete my Iron Man collection (sans issues of Tales of Suspense, in whose pages Iron Man graced for the first five years of his existence). To pay for the more expensive back-issues (like, um, Iron Man #1), I sold some of my more valuable issues of other Marvel titles -- especially The X-Men which by this time were wildly popular. My X-Men issues between #95 and #142 (no, I didn't have all the issues in this range) fetched me some coin!

I had begun to collect regularly again, but limited myself to Iron Man and The Avengers. I'd occasionally pick up some other titles -- The Squadron Supreme (Marvel's version of DC's Justice League) and The Ultimates (Marvel's "Ultimate" universe version of the Avengers) being two -- but that was it. By the mid-2000s, though, I had had enough. Marvel had begun to get "cross-over" crazy again, but most of all its writers had taken on a decidedly leftward tilt. (You can read my complaints about such instances here.) So, now I'll just appease myself with an occasional purchase of a Marvel Essential (black and white collections of a character's back issues) or a trade paperback (from any publisher).

And so it goes ...

Favorite Marvel Alternate Reality
	Age of Apocalypse (Earth-295)
	Squadron Supreme (Earth-712)
	Days of Future Past (Earth-811)
	2099 Universe (Earth-928)
	Ultimate Universe (Earth-1610)
	Earth X (Earth-9997)
	House of M (Earth-58163)

pollcode.com free polls

The Comics of Rhodey

The experiment -- done, for now

R.I.P. George Tuska

Name Five Creators and a Signature Stylization

Why? I ask again, WHY??

Adiós to my favorite comics blog

Comic creator aims to counter jihadist role models ...

1970s comics ads: The Special Investigator Kit!

Dullard Wizard

One big thing futurists got wrong!

The dirtiest line ever uttered in comics

When lousy science meets an otherwise cool story

And we're back!

Oh brother. Ultimate "Armor Wars!"

They're FORCE beams! Or, how to screw up Cyclops

Status of the Squadron Supreme?

Avengers featured in a M*A*S*H faux pas

Talk about a rough time!

What's your favorite Marvel Alternate Reality?

Possibly the LAMEST origin ever!

A newly discovered Fantastic Four issue!

Why Earth should rival the Kree and the Skrulls

YAAAAWWWN. Steve Rogers is coming back

1970s comics ads: Gritboy!

Who'da thunk it?

1970s comics ads: The anti-gravity device!

Tales of the DISPROPORTIONATE HEROES!

1970s comics ads: G.I. Joe and Bulletman

1970s comics ads: The Six Million Dollar Man

Rob Liefeld's hackery continued: Agent America

The definition of coolness

Tales of the DISPROPORTIONATE HEROES!

Cap no longer has to "cover up"

Dullard Wizard

Hube's "AW C'MON!" post of the week

1970s and 80s comics ads: The severed finger (and more)

(Fairly brief) "Wolverine" review (spoilers!)

Why Cap's shield is indestructible

Hidden gems

Geometrically challenged (and irresponsible) 1980s comics ads

The "Heroes Reborn" Iron Man armor -- better than you remember

Total hackery; or, how in the hell did Rob Liefeld get this gig?

O.P.P. -- One Panel of Pain

Simply ... the worst

The greatest of all Marvel epics

O.P.P. -- One Panel of Pain, March 27

Superhero Cookbook

Documented Aliens, part 3

Documented Aliens, part 2

Documented Aliens, part 1

1970s comics ads: The Money Maker

I watched "Watchmen"

Daredevil, Marvel and me

Why it's the best comics blog out there

The Botchmen

The OTHER right cross!

Dullard Wizard

It all began ...

Avengers featured in a MAS*H faux pas